[86attendees] How I know I am an IETFer

Tal Mizrahi <talmi@marvell.com> Fri, 15 March 2013 20:13 UTC

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From: Tal Mizrahi <talmi@marvell.com>
To: "86attendees@ietf.org" <86attendees@ietf.org>
Date: Fri, 15 Mar 2013 22:11:38 +0200
Thread-Topic: How I know I am an IETFer
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Subject: [86attendees] How I know I am an IETFer
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In the spirit of the last day of IETF 86, I was sitting in the Orlando airport and thinking about the IETF culture.
Indeed, "The Tao of IETF" does a good job of capturing the essence of the IETF, but I was trying to find a minimal set of attributes that characterize an IETFer, and here is what I came up with.

Q: How do I know I am an IETFer?
A: If I comply to at least 5 of the following conditions, I must be an IETFer.

-          My idea of "business casual" is a pair of jeans and an IETF T-shirt from the previous decade.

-          I have at least 2 of the following features: long hair, facial hair, nose hair, ear hair, receding hairline, glasses, "new attendee" badge.

-          I have never heard of Microsoft Word. I use vi.

-          I believe in keeping the internet free, but I have the most expensive broadband connection that money can buy.

-          I believe the words MUST, SHOULD and MAY must be written in uppercase. I believe my previous sentence has a typo.

-          I use IPv6.

-          I like to book all my trips at least 3 months in advance, including airline tickets, train tickets, toll pass, local currency, local SIM card, dinner plans, lunch plans.

-          Around 3 pm I get a craving for 6" cookies.

-          When my kids argue with me I tell them "let's take it to the mailing list".

-          I use Jabber.

-          When I eat ice-cream I call it an ice-cream BOF.

-          I like sitting in a room full of >100 engineers and reading my emails. I call it a working group meeting.

-          When I have a drink with a couple of friends I call it a bar BOF.

-          When I hold a meeting after 8pm I call it a bar BOF.

-          I celebrate PI day.

-          I have never heard of Microsoft Visio. I am a master of ASCII art.

-          When someone asks me if the Wi-Fi reception is good, I answer with the average bandwidth, average delay, delay variation and packet loss rate.

-          I am not sure what the IRTF is. I think it's a typo.

-          When I hear the word "vote", the word hmmmm comes to mind.

-          When people ask me "are you going to a conference?", I answer: "no, I am going to an IETF meeting".

-          I believe most of the problems in the middle east can be solved by rough consensus and running code.

-          I think Linux is the best.

-          When I check into a hotel I contact the IT team to help them improve the performance of the hotel network.

See you in Berlin!