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Re: [Acme] [Last-Call] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-acme-subdomains-04

Lars Eggert <lars@eggert.org> Mon, 16 January 2023 11:51 UTC

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From: Lars Eggert <lars@eggert.org>
In-Reply-To: <166864821687.27396.11214608162761711249@ietfa.amsl.com>
Date: Mon, 16 Jan 2023 13:51:23 +0200
Cc: gen-art@ietf.org, acme@ietf.org, draft-ietf-acme-subdomains.all@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org
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To: Reese Enghardt <ietf@tenghardt.net>
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Subject: Re: [Acme] [Last-Call] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-acme-subdomains-04
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Reese, thank you for your review. I have entered a No Objection ballot for this document.

Lars


> On Nov 17, 2022, at 03:23, Reese Enghardt via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> wrote:
> 
> Reviewer: Reese Enghardt
> Review result: Ready with Nits
> 
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
> by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
> like any other last call comments.
> 
> For more information, please see the FAQ at
> 
> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-acme-subdomains-04
> Reviewer: Reese Enghardt
> Review Date: 2022-11-16
> IETF LC End Date: 2022-11-21
> IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat
> 
> Summary: The document is well-written, clear, and to the point. I only found a
> few nits with opportunities for clarification.
> 
> Major issues: None.
> 
> Minor issues:
> 
> Section 2:
> 
> " Fully-Qualified Domain Name (FQDN): This is often just a clear way
>          of saying the same thing as "domain name of a node", as outlined
>          above.  However, the term is ambiguous."
> 
> These two sentences appear to contradict each other - Is the term clear or
> ambiguous? I suggest removing the word "clear" to simply state how the term is
> commonly used, and then point out the ambiguity.
> 
> Section 3:
> 
> "6. server replies with an updated order object […]"
> 
> Is this updated order object similar to the "authorization" objects?
> When it says "authorizations" in step 2, are these also objects?
> I suggest defining the term "object", e.g., in Section 2, and then
> double-checking that this term is applied consistency in the document.
> 
> Nits/editorial comments:
> 
> Section 4.3:
> 
> "If the client is unable to fulfill authorizations against parent domain"
> -> "If the client is unable to fulfill authorizations against a parent domain"
> 
> 
> 
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