Re: [alto] [CDNi] WGLC for draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09

Dear Danny,

thank you very much for reading the draft carefully and for your 
comments! We will go through them and address them.

  - Jan (and co-authors)

On 17.02.20 18:19, Danny Alex Lachos Perez wrote:
> Dear authors,
>
> I have performed a review of this draft (-09).
> My comments are below:
>
> 1) Section 2.2
>
>         "Application-Layer Traffic Optimization (ALTO) [RFC7285  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc7285>] is an
>         approach for guiding the resource provider selection process in
>         distributed applications that can choose among several candidate
>         resources providers to retrieve a given resource.  By conveying
>         network layer (topology) information, an ALTO server can provide
>         important information to "guide" the resource provider selection
>         process in distributed applications."
>
>      The two paragraphs are very similar in content, consider merging.
>     E.g.:
>     "Application-Layer Traffic Optimization (ALTO) [RFC7285] is an
>     approach for conveying network layer (topology) information to
>     "guide" the resource provider selection process in distributed
>     applications."
>
> 2) Section 2.2
>
>     "Recently, however, ALTO is
>         also being considered for improving the request routing in CDNs
>         [I-D.jenkins-alto-cdn-use-cases  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.jenkins-alto-cdn-use-cases>]."
>
>     The reference dates from 2012 and it is an expired draft
>
>
> 3) Section 2.2
>
>        "This would enable a uCDN to
>
>        determine if a given dCDN actually has the capabilities for a
>        given request with respect to the type of content requested."
>
>     Wordy sentence, consider rewriting: e.g., "This would enable a
>     uCDN to determine if a dCDN actually has the capabilities for a
>     given type of content request."
>
>
> 4) Section 2.1
>
>     "      related to CDNI Metadata.
>
>     o"
>
>     Remove last bullet (there is no text)
>
>
> 5) Introduction
>
>     "instead of getting the full resource which can be huge.Section 6  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-6>"
>
>     Consider adding a comma: "instead of getting the full resource*,*
>     which can be huge. Section 6"
>
>
> 6) Introduction
>
>     "Section 7  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-7>  andSection 8  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-8>  respectively."
>
>     Consider adding a comma: "Section 7 and Section 8, respectively."
>
>
> 7) Section 2.2
>
>     "   in particular for an FCI protocol:
>
>         o"
>
>     Remove bullet (there is no text)
>
>
> 8) Section 4.2.4
>
>     "In this example, the ALTO client is interested in changes of "my-
>         cdnifci-with-pid-footprints".  Considering two changes, the first one"
>
>     Consider rewriting: "In this example, the ALTO client is
>     interested in two changes of "my- cdnifci-with-pid-footprints".
>     The first one"
>
> 9) Section 2.2
>
>     "design of ALTO supports server pushed incremental updates
>
>            [I-D.ietf-alto-incr-update-sse  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.ietf-alto-incr-update-sse>].."
>
>     Consider updating the reference
>
>     sse-17 -> sse-19
>
>
> 10) Section 2.2
>
>     "  ALTO Path
>            Vector Extension [I-D.ietf-alto-path-vector  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.ietf-alto-path-vector>] is designed to allow"
>
>     Consider updating the reference
>
>     vector-08 -> vector-09
>
>
> 11) Section 2.2
>
>     "footprint by a dCDN, in particular
>            if such a footprint is being"
>
>     Consider adding a comma: "... in particular*,* if such ..."
>
>
> 12) Section 2.2
>
>     "would enable a dCDN to directly inform a uCDN about such changes."
>
>     Consider rewriting: "to directly inform a uCDN about such changes"
>     -> "to inform a uCDN about such changes directly"
>
>
> 13) Section 3.6
>
>     "value and footprints, where footprints are defined in"
>
>     Consider adding a comma: "... value, and footprints ..."
>
>
> 14) Section 5.6
>
>     "an full CDNI FCI resource (SeeSection 3.6  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-3.6>.)"
>
>     "an full" -> a full
>
>
> 15) Section 6
>
>     "CDNI capabilities, the most natrual way to satisfy this requirement"
>
>     "natrual" -> "natural"
>
>
> 16) Section 6
>
>     "   is to use the ALTO property map defined in
>         [I-D.ietf-alto-unified-props-new  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#ref-I-D.ietf-alto-unified-props-new>]."
>
>     Consider updating the reference
>
>     new-09 -> new-10
>
>
> 17) Section 6.1.1.2
>
>     "The entity identifiers of entities in an asn domain is encoded as a"
>
>     Consider changing the verb form: "The entity identifiers of
>     entities in an asn domain *are* encoded..."
>
>
> 18) Section 6.1.2.2
>
>     "The entity identifiers of entities in a countrycode domain is encoded"
>
>     Consider changing the verb form: "The entity identifiers of
>     entities in a countrycode domain *are* encoded..."
>
>
> 19) Section 7.1
>
>     "A new footprint type is to be registred"
>
>     Typo: "registred" -> registered
>
> 20) Section 7.3
>
>     "property type is to be registred, listed in Table 3."
>
>     Typo: "registred" -> registered
>
>
> 21) Section 8
>
>     "Security Considerations (Section 15  <https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-alto-cdni-request-routing-alto-09#section-15>) of the base protocol fully apply"
>
>     Consider fixing the link "Section 15"
>
>
> 22) Section 8
>
>     "expoing all full/filtered CDNI FCI resources in one of its IRDs."
>
>     "expoing" -> "exposing"
>
>
> Bestregards,
>
> Danny Lachos
>
>
> On Mon, Feb 3, 2020 at 1:06 PM Vijay Gurbani <vijay.gurbani@gmail.com 
> <mailto:vijay.gurbani@gmail.com>> wrote:
>
>     All: Jan and I will like to start WGLC for
>     draft-ietf-cdni-request-routing-alto-09.  The WGLC period will run
>     from Mon,
>     Feb 3 2020 to Wed, Feb 19 2020.
>
>     This email is also being cross-posted to the CDNI working group.
>
>     We will like to have one WG list member from ALTO and one WG list
>     member from
>     CDNI review this draft in depth.  Please send Jan and me an email
>     if you are willing
>     review the draft as part of WGLC.
>
>     In addition, we will like general reviews of the draft from both
>     ALTO and CDNI WGs.
>
>     Thank you.
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