[core] Review draft-ietf-core-oscore-groupcomm-06

Jim Schaad <ietf@augustcellars.com> Tue, 12 November 2019 19:05 UTC

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From: Jim Schaad <ietf@augustcellars.com>
To: draft-ietf-core-oscore-groupcomm@ietf.org
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Date: Tue, 12 Nov 2019 11:05:35 -0800
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Subject: [core] Review draft-ietf-core-oscore-groupcomm-06
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Here is a first read review of this document.

*  Section 1 - In the last paragraph you might want to mention that using
DTLS for doing hop-by-hop protection protects the routing information of the
packet from observers.

* Section 2.1 - If I don't distribute a master salt - does that mean the old
value is absent or kept?   Working is a little bit ambiguous.

* Section 2.1 - I am wondering if this section should contain some
information about how a client/server should handle key material in the
event of a roll over.  

* Section 2.2 - remove /including a Partial IV/ from the second paragraph.
A better answer would be /for that group/

* Section 3.1 - s/is extended as follows/is built differently./  From the
current sentence, I expected the as follows to be in the next sentence.

* Section 3.1.1 - The MAY include does not appear to match the CDDL
structure below - which is correct?

* Section 3.X - Should there be something about the use of the 'kid context'
parameter as a part of this section?

* Section 4.1 - You need to define 's' someplace and also, what is the bit
for it?   This means that you need to redefined the kid context definition
better or just refer to the definition in RFC 8613 since you are no longer
doing anything new from that document.   Not restating leads to fewer
errors.

* Appendix A - I think there may be a problem with the term "member of a
group" between this document and draft-dijk-core-groupcomm.  This document
includes all clients, while that document only incudes the servers.  This
may cause future problems.

Jim