Re: [Dots] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-dots-use-cases-23

[[e-mail]]

Dear Elwyn, 

One quick comment about:

> s7:  This is an informational document and, as such, cannot have
> normative
> references.  Please combine all references into one refererences
> section.

If we refer to the IESG statement available at: https://ietf.org/about/groups/iesg/statements/normative-informative-references/, we can read the following:

"Note 3: The normative/informative distinction is relevant in any document that amounts to a technical specification, even if its intended status is Experimental or Informational."

So, that's fine to have a normative ref section (if justified) for this document.

That's said, I do personally think that at least [RFC8782][RFC8783] have to be moved as Informative... but not for the reasons mentioned in the review. 

Cheers,
Med

> -----Message d'origine-----
> De : Dots [mailto:[e-mail]] De la part de Elwyn Davies
> via Datatracker
> Envoyé : mercredi 10 juin 2020 18:00
> À : [e-mail]
> Cc : [e-mail]; [e-mail];
> [e-mail]
> Objet : [Dots] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-dots-use-cases-23
> 
> Reviewer: Elwyn Davies
> Review result: Ready with Nits
> 
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
> by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
> like any other last call comments.
> 
> For more information, please see the FAQ at
> 
> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-dots-use-cases-23
> Reviewer: Elwyn Davies
> Review Date: 2020-06-10
> IETF LC End Date: 2020-06-11
> IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat
> 
> Summary:
> Ready wih some minor nits.
> 
> Major issues:
> None
> 
> Minor issues:
> None
> 
> Nits/editorial comments:
> s1, para 1: Just a thought:  might be worth adding to the end of this
> para:
> "and increase the time for deployment in a situation where speed is
> often of
> the essence".
> 
> s1, last para: Suggest adding in reference to DOTS requirements doc
> which is
> referred to in s2: OLD:
>    This document provides sample use cases that provided input for the
>    design of the DOTS protocols [RFC8782][RFC8783].
> NEW
>    This document provides sample use cases that motivated the
> requirements
>    for the DOTS protocols [RFC8612] and provided input for the design
> of
>    those protocols [RFC8782][RFC8783].
> ENDS
> 
> s2: For more logical ordering, move the definition of DDos Mitigation
> Service
> Provider after definition of DDoS Mitigation Service.
> 
> s2, DDoS Mitigation Service:
> OLD:
>       Service subscriptions usually
>       involve Service Level Agreement (SLA) that have to be met.
> NEW:
>       Each service subscription usually
>       involves a Service Level Agreement (SLA) that has to be met.
> ENDS
> 
> s3.1, para 1: The abbreviation ITP has already been defined so you
> shouldn't
> have a redefinition here.
> 
> s3.1, para 7: s/thought different/though different/
> 
> s3.1, 2nd set of bullets, that are below Fig 1: This woud be more
> elegant using
> (a), (b), etc as the bullet labels.
> 
> s3.1: Comment (not being familiar with the DOTS proposals): The text
> indicates
> that the ITP mitigation effort is an all or nothing buisness.  Is this
> always
> the case or could the client request or the server provide a
> proportional
> response rather than an all or nothing response?
> 
> s3.2, last sentence of 2nd para after Fig 2: s/These exact/The exact/
> 
> s3.3, para 2: s/various information/various sets of information/
> 
> s3.3, para after Figure 4: s/monitor various network traffic/monitor
> various
> aspects of the network traffic/.
> 
> s3.3, 2nd para after Figure 4: s/it's/it is/
> 
> s3.3, last five paras: Calling out a web interface specifically is
> overly
> specific.  Suggest adding 'for example'in at least one case or
> changing it to
> 'user interface'.
> 
> s3.3, first para on page 11:
> OLD:
> to infer the DDoS Mitigation to elaborate and coordinate.
> NEW:
> to infer, elaborate and coordinate the appropriate DDoS Mitigation.
> ENDS
> 
> s3.3, 3rd and subsequent paras on page 11: The orchestrator appears to
> change
> from one DOTS server to a plurality at this point.  Please make it
> clear
> whether there is one or many.  If only one, then s/The orchestrator
> DOTS
> servers returns this information back/The orchestrator DOTS server
> returns this
> information/ and s/servers/server/ subsequently.
> 
> s3.3, last para s/like  requesting/such as requesting/
> 
> s7:  This is an informational document and, as such, cannot have
> normative
> references.  Please combine all references into one refererences
> section.
> 
> 
> 
> _______________________________________________
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