Re: [Ecrit] I-D Action: draft-ietf-ecrit-similar-location-12.txt

[Dan Banks <[e-mail]>]

I do not have specific recommendations for reorganizing.  I do think it would be better if the overview was more of an overview (i.e., shorter than a full description which would presumably follow).

I also just noticed that the last paragraph of section 3 states "The next section shows examples", but those examples do not appear until section 5.  We should probably fix that to say "Section 5 shows examples".

Dan

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Randall Gellens <[e-mail]>
> Sent: Tuesday, October 26, 2021 6:02 PM
> To: Dan Banks <[e-mail]>
> Cc: [e-mail]; [e-mail]
> Subject: Re: [Ecrit] I-D Action: draft-ietf-ecrit-similar-location-12.txt
> 
> I support Dan's suggested edits.  Regarding the suggestion to reorganize the
> text, Dan, do you have specific suggestions (e.g., move paragraphs x-y of
> Section 3 to follow Paragraph z of Section 4)?
> 
> --Randall
> 
> On 12 Oct 2021, at 9:21, Dan Banks wrote:
> 
> > I am satisfied with the changes made in this version.  There are a
> > handful of new editorial issues:
> >
> > Invalid Location and Valid Location definitions have a difference in
> > wording that I think is unintentional:
> > Invalid Location:  A Civic Location that, when included versus Valid
> > Location:  A Civic Location, when included I prefer the inclusion of
> > 'that'.
> > Both of these definitions are also missing a period at the end.
> >
> > In section 3,
> > there is no such thing as "15th Ave North should be there is no such
> > thing as "15th Avenue North"
> > (expand Ave and add missing double quote)
> >
> > In the first paragraph of section 4, there appears to be an escaping
> > issue:
> > <civicAddressgt;
> >
> > I still believe the document could be improved with a bit of
> > reorganization of sections 3 and 4, but I support advancing the
> > document without additional changes if that is the consensus.
> >
> > Dan Banks
> >
> >> -----Original Message-----
> >> From: Ecrit <[e-mail]> On Behalf Of
> >> [e-mail]
> >> Sent: Monday, October 11, 2021 7:30 PM
> >> To: [e-mail]
> >> Cc: [e-mail]
> >> Subject: [Ecrit] I-D Action: draft-ietf-ecrit-similar-location-12.txt
> >>
> >>
> >> A New Internet-Draft is available from the on-line Internet-Drafts
> >> directories.
> >> This draft is a work item of the Emergency Context Resolution with
> >> Internet Technologies WG of the IETF.
> >>
> >>         Title           : A LoST extension to return complete and
> >> similar location info
> >>         Authors         : Brian Rosen
> >>                           Roger Marshall
> >>                           Jeff Martin
> >> 	Filename        : draft-ietf-ecrit-similar-location-12.txt
> >> 	Pages           : 17
> >> 	Date            : 2021-10-11
> >>
> >> Abstract:
> >>    This document introduces a new way to provide returned location
> >>    information in LoST responses that is either of a completed or
> >>    similar form to the original input civic location, based on
> >> whether
> >>    valid or invalid civic address elements are returned within the
> >>    <findServiceResponse> message.  This document defines a new
> >> extension
> >>    to the <findServiceResponse> message within the LoST protocol
> >>    [RFC5222] that enables the LoST protocol to return in a response a
> >>    completed civic address element set for a valid location response,
> >>    and one or more suggested sets of similar location information for
> >> an
> >>    invalid location.  These two types of civic addresses are referred
> >> to
> >>    as either "complete location" or "similar location", and are
> >> included
> >>    as a compilation of CAtype xml elements within the existing LoST
> >>    <findServiceResponse> message structure.
> >>
> >>
> >> The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
> >>
> https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fdat
> >> a
> >> tracker.ietf.org%2Fdoc%2Fdraft-ietf-ecrit-similar-
> >>
> location%2F&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%40ddti.net%7C2677c3624c9b43
> >>
> ef4bf408d98d0f141a%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29c1aff8251101b%7C0%7C0%7C6
> >>
> 37695918186302761%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMD
> >>
> AiLCJQIjoiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C1000&amp;sdata=
> >>
> P3BH1wZSXLDkc8UrC7mVYLaNlTMWLj63lN4M9sivfa0%3D&amp;reserved=0
> >>
> >> There is also an htmlized version available at:
> >>
> https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fdat
> >> a
> >> tracker.ietf.org%2Fdoc%2Fhtml%2Fdraft-ietf-ecrit-similar-location-
> >>
> 12&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%40ddti.net%7C2677c3624c9b43ef4bf408
> >>
> d98d0f141a%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29c1aff8251101b%7C0%7C0%7C637695918
> >>
> 186302761%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMDAiLCJQIj
> >>
> oiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C1000&amp;sdata=mPns%2
> >>
> BzOYeJw5Wv6ZksmQKvkQVy%2BooWwkpOX0jJOK9Rw%3D&amp;reserved=
> >> 0
> >>
> >> A diff from the previous version is available at:
> >>
> https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fww
> >> w.ietf.org%2Frfcdiff%3Furl2%3Ddraft-ietf-ecrit-similar-location-
> >>
> 12&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%40ddti.net%7C2677c3624c9b43ef4bf408
> >>
> d98d0f141a%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29c1aff8251101b%7C0%7C0%7C637695918
> >>
> 186302761%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMDAiLCJQIj
> >>
> oiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C1000&amp;sdata=BQ1%2F
> >> b3vGjlo4Oh80lx6xiKegu1FpzlWjsTb%2BCydveVI%3D&amp;reserved=0
> >>
> >>
> >> Internet-Drafts are also available by anonymous FTP at:
> >>
> https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=ftp%3A%2F%2Fftp.i
> >>
> etf%2F&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%40ddti.net%7Ccb29e7a0170841f40b
> 2a08d
> >>
> 998cc3dd0%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29c1aff8251101b%7C0%7C0%7C6377088252
> 9081
> >>
> 5667%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMDAiLCJQIjoiV2lu
> MzIiLCJB
> >>
> TiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C1000&amp;sdata=%2FQ47hK8r708zBmq6
> T%2FmVx
> >> 5rlrIzT0GOqXwn%2Ff%2FBUt%2Bg%3D&amp;reserved=0
> >> .org%2Finternet-
> >>
> drafts%2F&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%40ddti.net%7C2677c3624c9b43e
> >>
> f4bf408d98d0f141a%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29c1aff8251101b%7C0%7C0%7C63
> >>
> 7695918186302761%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMD
> >>
> AiLCJQIjoiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C1000&amp;sdata=
> >>
> 20pHDNNfNOyd1JvEeCtlhJz%2FT6VJzj3wN%2FKSSD8G63k%3D&amp;reserve
> >> d=0
> >>
> >>
> >> _______________________________________________
> >> Ecrit mailing list
> >> [e-mail]
> >>
> https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fww
> >>
> w.ietf.org%2Fmailman%2Flistinfo%2Fecrit&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%
> >>
> 40ddti.net%7C2677c3624c9b43ef4bf408d98d0f141a%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29
> >>
> c1aff8251101b%7C0%7C0%7C637695918186312756%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbG
> >>
> Zsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMDAiLCJQIjoiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6
> >>
> Mn0%3D%7C1000&amp;sdata=fyo4rmGKcNdQUGrlrcucZBRYR8JBmvaQKB99
> >> XOeE7jI%3D&amp;reserved=0
> >
> > _______________________________________________
> > Ecrit mailing list
> > [e-mail]
> >
> https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fww
> w.
> >
> ietf.org%2Fmailman%2Flistinfo%2Fecrit&amp;data=04%7C01%7Cdbanks%40
> ddti
> >
> .net%7Ccb29e7a0170841f40b2a08d998cc3dd0%7C4c0f48ba5f2944b1b29c1aff8
> 251
> >
> 101b%7C0%7C0%7C637708825290815667%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8ey
> JWIjoiMC4w
> >
> LjAwMDAiLCJQIjoiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C1000&am
> p;sdat
> >
> a=xKFVAi123p%2F8xR2n1C8HopkEAj2QXGGJn29SdkEDX0A%3D&amp;reserv
> ed=0