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Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-lamps-cmp-algorithms-12

Lars Eggert <lars@eggert.org> Wed, 25 May 2022 09:01 UTC

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From: Lars Eggert <lars@eggert.org>
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Date: Wed, 25 May 2022 12:01:12 +0300
Cc: gen-art@ietf.org, spasm@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org, draft-ietf-lamps-cmp-algorithms.all@ietf.org
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To: Dan Romascanu <dromasca@gmail.com>
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Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-lamps-cmp-algorithms-12
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Dan, thank you for your review. I have entered a No Objection ballot for this document.

Lars


> On 2022-5-6, at 12:27, Dan Romascanu via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> wrote:
> 
> Reviewer: Dan Romascanu
> Review result: Ready with Nits
> 
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
> by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
> like any other last call comments.
> 
> For more information, please see the FAQ at
> 
> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-lamps-cmp-algorithms-12
> Reviewer: Dan Romascanu
> Review Date: 2022-05-06
> IETF LC End Date: 2022-05-11
> IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat
> 
> Summary:
> 
> Ready with nits.
> 
> This document updates RFC 4210 describing the conventions for using concrete
> cryptographic algorithms with the Certificate Management Protocol (CMP), which
> is used to enroll and further manage the lifecycle of X.509 certificates. Its
> reading requires expertise and familiarity with previously published documents.
> The document is ready. I pointed to a few nits, most of them improvements on
> readability and orientation.
> 
> Major issues:
> 
> Minor issues:
> 
> Nits/editorial comments:
> 
> 1. It would be useful to provide references for terms at first occurrence. For
> example Section 2 directly mentions OOBCertHash, CertStatus, Challenge,
> PBMParameter, DHBMParameter, etc. without providing a reference.
> 
> 2. Section 2.2 - provide reference for X.509 at first occurrence (probably
> [RFC4210])
> 
> 3. For clarity and in order to avoid confusions it would be useful to expand MAC
> 
> 4. For clarity it would be useful to position Table 3 to start at top of the
> page to avoid split at printing
> 
> 
> 
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