[Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-tsvwg-aqm-dualq-coupled-24

[Christer Holmberg via Datatracker <[e-mail]>]

Reviewer: Christer Holmberg
Review result: Almost Ready

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Document: draft-ietf-tsvwg-aqm-dualq-coupled-24

Reviewer: Christer Holmberg
Review Date: 2022-08-23
IETF LC End Date: 2022-07-21
IESG Telechat date: 2022-08-25

Summary:

The content and technology of the document is outside the area of expertise, so
my comments are mainly related to the readability of the document. I list
everything as Nits/editorial issues, eventhough some could also be considered
Minor issues.

Major issues:

N/A

Minor issues:

N/A

Nits/editorial comments:

ABSTRACT:

I think the Abstract is too long. Also, it starts with the "This specification
defines..." sentence. I think it should start with a few sentences on what the
problem is, and then indicate what the document defines in order to solve that
problem.

INTRODUCTION (Section 1):

In the beginning of the Section there is a "This document specifies a
framework..." statement. Then, there is a similar statement at the end of
Section 1.1., which is only supposed to describe the problem statement - not
the solution. There is also a Scope section (1.2) and a Features section (1.4),
but it is quite difficult to separate between Scope and Features.

SECTION 2:

It seems like the actual requirements for the framework are not presented until
Section 2.5. I think the requirements should come earlier, before the solution.

SECURITY CONSIDERATIONS (Section 4):

There is quite a bit of text in the Security Considerations. In general that is
not a bad thing :)

My question is whether the content is actually about security? Much seem to be
more "operational" issues.