Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast-14.txt
<mohamed.boucadair@orange.com> Mon, 09 January 2017 15:11 UTC
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From: mohamed.boucadair@orange.com
To: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>, "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: review of draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast-14.txt
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Date: Mon, 09 Jan 2017 15:11:49 +0000
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Cc: "draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast.all@ietf.org" <draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast.all@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast-14.txt
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Hi Francis, Thank you for the review. Please see inline. Cheers, Med > -----Message d'origine----- > De : Francis Dupont [mailto:Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr] > Envoyé : lundi 9 janvier 2017 15:34 > À : gen-art@ietf.org > Cc : draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast.all@ietf.org > Objet : review of draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast-14.txt > > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area > Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed > by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just > like any other last call comments. > > For more information, please see the FAQ at > > <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. > > Document: draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-multicast-14.txt > Reviewer: Francis Dupont > Review Date: 20170106 > IETF LC End Date: 2017012 > IESG Telechat date: unknown > > Summary: Ready with Nits > > Major issues: None > > Minor issues: please consider to publish this as a BCP (vs standard > track)? > I don't know if this question is new or already got an answer, > this is why I kept the Ready summary. BTW the IANA section is empty > so there is nothing requiring a standard track document. [Med] The intended status is aligned with the status used for the counterpart unicast specifications (DS-Lite, MAP-*). > > Nits/editorial comments: > - ToC page 3 and 10 page 16: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments [Med] It seems that the RFC editor accepts "Acknowledgements", too. > > - 4.2 page 7: RECOMMENDED inside an explicitly "not normative" > section 4 [Med] Good catch. Changed it to "recommended". > > - 6.1 page 11: in "The mB4 may create": may -> MAY? [Med] Yes, fixed. > > - 6.3 page 11: in "decapsulate the IPv6 packet": IPv6 -> IPv4 [Med] What about "decapsulate the IPv6 header"? > > - 7.2 page 13 figure 3 and 8.1.1 page 15 figure 4: > mPreifx64 -> mPrefix64 [Med] Thank you for catching those. Fixed. > > - 7.2 page 13 last paragraph: (S6,G6) -> (S6, G6) > (I am not strict about space or not but in this paragraph there is > already a (S6, G6)) [Med] I guess you meant change (S6, G6) to (S6,G6). Fixed. > > - 7.5 page 14: Global scope;) -> Global scope) [Med] I changed it to: OLD: to "E" Global scope;) NEW: to "E" for Global scope) > > - 8.4 page 16: please use a non-breaking space so (S6, G6) stays > on the same line in the text version (and hopefully (S4, G4) too). [Med] Actually, I removed the extra space to be consistent with other usages in the document. > > - Authors' Addresses page 20: China -> PR China (or any variant > including CN (ISO IS 3166 2 letter code)) [Med] Changed it to "P.R. China". > > Regards > > Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr
- [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-softwire-dslite-mu… Francis Dupont
- Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-softwire-dslit… mohamed.boucadair