Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-trill-directory-assist-mechanisms-10.txt
Donald Eastlake <d3e3e3@gmail.com> Thu, 12 January 2017 03:09 UTC
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From: Donald Eastlake <d3e3e3@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, 11 Jan 2017 22:09:20 -0500
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To: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>
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Cc: draft-ietf-trill-directory-assist-mechanisms.all@ietf.org, "gen-art@ietf.org Review Team" <gen-art@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-trill-directory-assist-mechanisms-10.txt
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Hi Francis, See below. On Mon, Jan 9, 2017 at 9:05 AM, Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr> wrote: > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area > Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed > by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just > like any other last call comments. > > For more information, please see the FAQ at > > <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. > > Document: draft-ietf-trill-directory-assist-mechanisms-10.txt > Reviewer: Francis Dupont > Review Date: 20170105 > IETF LC End Date: 2017019 > IESG Telechat date: unknown > > Summary: Ready > > Major issues: None > > Minor issues: None Thanks. I agree with all the below unless otherwise stated. > Nits/editorial comments: > - 1.1 page 5: nomrally -> normally > > - 1.2 page 6: MscSA -> MacSA > > - 2.3.2 page 11: cancelled -> canceled > > - 3.1 page 19: acknowledgement -> acknowledgment > > - 3.2.1 page 21: AFN is from an unknown space: please add > a reference to where AFN is defined or to its registry (or both). I'll add this to the Terminology section. > - 3.2.2.2 page 26 MacDA: in "this MAC address must be unicast" > as it is a requirement consider to put a MUST or to change to "has to" > > - 3.3 page 27: in "A Pull Directory server may have a limit" use > a MAY? "MAY" is wrong. I'll change it to "might". > - 3.3 page 28: you use the F, P, N, etc bits when their meanings are > in 3.3.1 so: > * please add a forward reference to 3.3.1 > * add their names (flood, positive, negative) at first use > > - 3.3.1 page 30: in "Message must have either" must -> MUST/has to > > - 3.3.2 page 31: appropiately -> appropriately > > - 3.5.1 page 33: knowns -> knows > > - 3.5.3 page 34: Chanel -> Channel > > - 3.6 page 35 (twice): [Aa]cknowledgement -> [Aa]cknowledgment > > - 3.6.3 page 37: QTYPE 3 and 4 are unassigned > > - 3.7 page 37: chagnes -> changes > > - 7.1 page 45: only use of "IANA will assign" vs > "IANA is requested to assign". BTW look for what is the best and > use only this one. > > - 7.1 page 45: ESDADI -> ESADI and ESDAI -> ESADI > > - 7.1 page 45: in the figure break the line between "for" and "expansion". > BTW it doesn't matter if a variable field spreads over more than one > line... > > - Authors' Addresses page 52: (perhaps a troff macro issue): > please insert a comma before the country name. OK. > - Authors' Addresses page 52: China -> PR China (or any variant > including CN (ISO IS 3166 2 letter code)) I don't see any reason to change this postal address which i have determined by experiment to work fine, at least for mail posted in the USA. > Regards > > Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr > > PS: I know some of you are from a country (from a list of 2) not using > international units but millisecond abbrev is ms, not millisec... I'll just spell it out. Thanks, Donald =============================== Donald E. Eastlake 3rd +1-508-333-2270 (cell) 155 Beaver Street, Milford, MA 01757 USA d3e3e3@gmail.com
- [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-trill-directory-as… Francis Dupont
- Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-trill-director… Donald Eastlake
- Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-trill-director… Jari Arkko