Re: [Gen-art] IETC LC Review of draft-ietf-lmap-framework-12
Jari Arkko <jari.arkko@piuha.net> Thu, 09 April 2015 13:11 UTC
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From: Jari Arkko <jari.arkko@piuha.net>
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Date: Thu, 09 Apr 2015 16:10:39 +0300
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To: Tom Taylor <tom.taylor.stds@gmail.com>
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Cc: Al Morton <acmorton@att.com>, aakhter@gmail.com, Gen Art <gen-art@ietf.org>, Benoit Claise <bclaise@cisco.com>, paitken@brocade.com, The IESG <iesg@ietf.org>, marcelo@it.uc3m.es, trevor.burbridge@bt.com, "EARDLEY, Phil" <philip.eardley@bt.com>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] IETC LC Review of draft-ietf-lmap-framework-12
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Thank you for the review & edits! Jari On 07 Apr 2015, at 21:40, Tom Taylor <tom.taylor.stds@gmail.com> wrote: > My previous review comments have been taken care of in the -12 version. The document is good to go from my point of view. > > Tom Taylor > > On 09/03/2015 9:15 AM, Tom Taylor wrote: >> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on >> Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at >> >> <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>. >> >> Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments >> you may receive. >> >> Document: draft-ietf-lmap-framework-11 >> Reviewer: Tom Taylor >> Review Date: 2015/03/05 >> IETF LC End Date: 2015/03/09 >> IESG Telechat date: 2015/03/12 >> >> Summary: Beautifully written and very complete. A few editorial nits >> that could be safely ignored without affecting the utility of the document. >> >> Major issues: >> >> Minor issues: >> >> Nits/editorial comments: >> >> Section 3, "Logging Information": s/and which/which/ >> >> Section 5, bullet 1.: not sure a protocol is trying to achieve a >> problem. Achieve a solution to a problem (solve or resolve it) or >> achieve an objective, perhaps. >> >> Section 7, second paragraph: should delete the reference to the charter, >> since that is ephemeral information. I would rephrase as follows: >> s/similar to the protocol/just as is the protocol/ >> >> > > _______________________________________________ > Gen-art mailing list > Gen-art@ietf.org > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
- Re: [Gen-art] IETC LC Review of draft-ietf-lmap-f… Tom Taylor
- Re: [Gen-art] IETC LC Review of draft-ietf-lmap-f… Jari Arkko
- [Gen-art] IETC LC Review of draft-ietf-lmap-frame… Tom Taylor
- Re: [Gen-art] IETC LC Review of draft-ietf-lmap-f… philip.eardley