[Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-ecrit-held-routing-04

Jouni Korhonen <jouni.nospam@gmail.com> Wed, 03 February 2016 23:31 UTC

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To: gen-art@ietf.org, draft-ietf-ecrit-held-routing.all@ietf.org
From: Jouni Korhonen <jouni.nospam@gmail.com>
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Date: Wed, 03 Feb 2016 15:31:24 -0800
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Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-ecrit-held-routing-04
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I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area 
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the 
IESG for the IETF Chair. Please wait for direction from your document 
shepherd or AD before posting a new version of the draft. For more 
information, please see the FAQ at <​ 
http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.


- Jouni

Summary:
	This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits
  	that should be fixed before publication. The nits are only
  	editorial.

Comments:

I do have little expertise on ECRIT topics in general so bear with me.

* The I-D gives IDnits errors and stuff and those must be corrected.
   Specifically those that concern the abstract, updating RFCs and such.

* Starting from Section 1 (Intro) most of the acronyms are not expanded
   on the first use.. or at all in the document. Revisit all acronyms
   including HELD, LoST etc and expand them on the first use.

* The sentence on line 185 (IDnits) took me a while to parse ;) Maybe
   some rewording would make it a bit more readable.

* There is no reference to "forest guide". I would expect to see one
   and at least a note that it is a special instance of a LoST server.

* In Section 4 URN is written multiple times as "urn".

* On line 290 s/PSAPS/PSAPs

* On lines 304 and 310 s/section/Section

* On line 462 s/Layer 7/layer-7