Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness-03

Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com> Thu, 04 August 2016 15:02 UTC

Return-Path: <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com>
X-Original-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Delivered-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 66D2012DA28 for <gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com>; Thu, 4 Aug 2016 08:02:49 -0700 (PDT)
X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com
X-Spam-Flag: NO
X-Spam-Score: -4.201
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=-4.201 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, HTML_MESSAGE=0.001, RCVD_IN_DNSWL_MED=-2.3, RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_H2=-0.001, SPF_PASS=-0.001] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no
Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id pVNHgwFWtaTN for <gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com>; Thu, 4 Aug 2016 08:02:44 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from usplmg20.ericsson.net (usplmg20.ericsson.net [198.24.6.45]) (using TLSv1.2 with cipher ECDHE-RSA-AES256-GCM-SHA384 (256/256 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id B804512DA15 for <gen-art@ietf.org>; Thu, 4 Aug 2016 08:02:43 -0700 (PDT)
X-AuditID: c618062d-5abff70000000a08-18-57a359794c71
Received: from EUSAAHC005.ericsson.se (Unknown_Domain [147.117.188.87]) by (Symantec Mail Security) with SMTP id 07.DC.02568.97953A75; Thu, 4 Aug 2016 17:04:28 +0200 (CEST)
Received: from EUSAAMB107.ericsson.se ([147.117.188.124]) by EUSAAHC005.ericsson.se ([147.117.188.87]) with mapi id 14.03.0301.000; Thu, 4 Aug 2016 10:57:10 -0400
From: Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com>
To: "Pal Martinsen (palmarti)" <palmarti@cisco.com>
Thread-Topic: Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness-03
Thread-Index: AdHW0802DzrcZCKMRWCrf5R64bZmCgXc0NwAAAZXj7A=
Date: Thu, 4 Aug 2016 14:57:10 +0000
Message-ID: <ABCAA4EF18F17B4FB619EA93DEF7939A4E6B1EA5@eusaamb107.ericsson.se>
References: <ABCAA4EF18F17B4FB619EA93DEF7939A4E665CDB@eusaamb107.ericsson.se> <DC0BB6B3-A683-43B6-A080-1F0448583388@cisco.com>
In-Reply-To: <DC0BB6B3-A683-43B6-A080-1F0448583388@cisco.com>
Accept-Language: en-US
Content-Language: en-US
X-MS-Has-Attach:
X-MS-TNEF-Correlator:
x-originating-ip: [147.117.188.11]
Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="_000_ABCAA4EF18F17B4FB619EA93DEF7939A4E6B1EA5eusaamb107erics_"
MIME-Version: 1.0
X-Brightmail-Tracker: H4sIAAAAAAAAA+NgFprKIsWRmVeSWpSXmKPExsUyuXRPuG5N5OJwgx8PDS3W919ntrj66jOL xfvrK1kcmD2m/N7I6rFkyU8mjy+XP7MFMEdx2aSk5mSWpRbp2yVwZfTsvsBWcKSbsWLO2S/M DYxP2hm7GDk5JARMJG5vPcLcxcjFISSwgVHi2cG17BDOMkaJd/deMIFUsQlYSGz//ZwVxBYR MJZoPnIUrIhZYA6jxOSWKywgCWEBX4mHqycyQhQFSLxZsZ4ZwraSOHalhR3EZhFQkbj0uRus nheo/t0GkDNAtjUwSuw/2Qm2jVPAVuLCrY1gzYwCYhLfT60BizMLiEvcejKfCeJuAYkle84z Q9iiEi8f/2OFsJUkPv6ezw5Rny/x5OxcZohlghInZz5hmcAoMgvJqFlIymYhKZvFyAEU15RY v0sfokRRYkr3Q3YIW0Oidc5cdmTxBYzsqxg5SosLcnLTjQw2MQIj65gEm+4OxvvTPQ8xCnAw KvHwKhguChdiTSwrrsw9xCjBwawkwisbsThciDclsbIqtSg/vqg0J7X4EKM0B4uSOK/YI8Vw IYH0xJLU7NTUgtQimCwTB6dUA6PHgbY3J/w9Ui0/nTMVYOB+FWH4JKbpduUGzt3+Dnfv7Xut anP+ZPz1Km2vaJXqB3lBmxT9rgvMmt/2Z3NQezfPkf1mdyw+z3KzO6f2LeC5wur99W9vTrx0 r2zRgU3/Mj6tf8OafWv2YUvpXWldjRf+fngeHfhvMufxC14FAmGRjNe2b/ivNvWbEktxRqKh FnNRcSIADhviTagCAAA=
Archived-At: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/Xlaxw77O-PIjh2vQga6_1yij_s8>
Cc: "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>, "draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness.all@tools.ietf.org" <draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness.all@tools.ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness-03
X-BeenThere: gen-art@ietf.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.17
Precedence: list
List-Id: "GEN-ART: General Area Review Team" <gen-art.ietf.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/options/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/browse/gen-art/>
List-Post: <mailto:gen-art@ietf.org>
List-Help: <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Thu, 04 Aug 2016 15:02:49 -0000

Hi,
  Many thanks.

Best,
Meral

From: Pal Martinsen (palmarti) [mailto:palmarti@cisco.com]
Sent: Wednesday, August 03, 2016 11:55 PM
To: Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com>
Cc: draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness.all@tools.ietf.org; gen-art@ietf.org
Subject: Re: Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness-03


On 05 Jul 2016, at 17:46, Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com<mailto:meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com>> wrote:

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.


Document:  draft-ietf-ice-dualstack-fairness-03
Reviewer: Meral Shirazipour
Review Date: 2016-07-05
IETF LC End Date:  2016-07-08
IESG Telechat date: NA


Summary:
This draft is ready to be published as BCP RFC but I have some comments.

Major issues:

Minor issues:

Nits/editorial comments:
-[Page 2], “arguable be better"---->"arguably be better"
Fixed

-[Page 2], “types know"---->"types known"
Fixed

-[Page 8], Section 7.1 and 7.2 have the same title, is that by choice?
Sort of. Theee sections are implementation details and will be removed in the published RFC.


-[Page 9], Section 10.1, first reference ([I-D.ietf-ice-rfc5245bis])to be updated to latest version.
-Also on [Page 4] Reference to “section 4.1.2.1" of [I-D.ietf-ice-rfc5245bis], it would be good to list the section title too (in case the numbering changes in the final version).
Good point. Fixed.


New version uploaded. It also contains fixes from the secdir review.

.-.
Pål-Erik



Best Regards,
Meral
---
Meral Shirazipour
Ericsson Research
www.ericsson.com<http://www.ericsson.com/>