Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-kitten-pkinit-alg-agility-05

[Robbie Harwood <[e-mail]>]

Christer Holmberg <[e-mail]> writes:

> Reviewer: Christer Holmberg
> Review result: Ready with Issues
>
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
> by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
> like any other last call comments.
>
> For more information, please see the FAQ at
>
> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
>
> Document: draft-ietf-kitten-pkinit-alg-agility-05
> Reviewer: Christer Holmberg
> Review Date: 2019-03-01
> IETF LC End Date: 2019-02-17
> IESG Telechat date: 2019-03-07
>
> Summary: The draft needs to be more clear on how RFC 4556 is updated.
>
> Major issues: None
>
> Minor issues:
>
> Q1:
>
> For the unfamiliar reader, it is unclear exactly how RFC 4556 is updated. There
> is e.g., no text indicating what sections of 4556 are updated, and there is no
> "Updates to RFC 4556" section.
>
> I assume the remainder of the draft then updates RFC 4556, but I think it needs
> to be more clear for the unfamiliar reader.
>
> Even if a "Updates to RFC 4556" section would not be feasible, the document
> should indicate what parts/sections of 4556 are updated, and what sections in
> the draft defines those updates.
>
> Nits/editorial comments:
>
> Q2:
>
> Both the Abstract and the Introduction start with "This document updates
> PKINIT,..."
>
> I think it would be good to first give some background information on the
> issue(s), and then state that the document fixes those issues by updating RFC
> 4556.

Hi Christer, thanks for your review.

Greg has created and uploaded a new version (-06) to the tracker that
hopefully addresses your concerns.

Thanks,
--Robbie