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Re: [Gen-art] Generate review of draft-ietf-tls-cached-info-20

Hannes Tschofenig <hannes.tschofenig@gmx.net> Thu, 17 December 2015 16:04 UTC

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To: Jari Arkko <jari.arkko@piuha.net>, Jouni <jouni.nospam@gmail.com>
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From: Hannes Tschofenig <hannes.tschofenig@gmx.net>
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Cc: draft-ietf-tls-cached-info@ietf.org, "gen-art@ietf.org (gen-art@ietf.org)" <gen-art@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Generate review of draft-ietf-tls-cached-info-20
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Yes, I have seen the review comments and will address them in the next
few days.

On 12/17/2015 01:56 PM, Jari Arkko wrote:
> Thank you very much for the review, Jouni! Authors, do you have observed these comments?
> 
> Jari
> 
> On 30 Nov 2015, at 05:46, Jouni <jouni.nospam@gmail.com> wrote:
> 
>> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
>> <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
>>
>> Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive.
>>
>> Document: draft-ietf-tls-cached-info-20
>> Reviewer: Jouni Korhonen
>> Review Date: 2015-11-29
>> IETF LC End Date: 2015-12-04
>> IESG Telechat date: 2015-12-17
>>
>>
>> Summary:
>> --------
>>
>> Ready for publication with some nits.
>>
>> Comments:
>> ---------
>>
>> The document was good read and easy to understand.
>>
>> Minor issues/nits:
>> ------------------
>>
>> * IDnits spits out some warning & comments that all seem to be bogus. However, the normative reference to RFC 4634 needs to be replaced with RFC 6234.
>>
>> * The document describes in few places how the mechanisms specified extends/updates the Certificate and CertificateRequest structures. So maybe the draft should also state that in its boilerplate “Updates: 5246, 7250” ?
>>
>> * Line 99: s/its’/its
>>
>> * Line 164: s/data\.\./data\.
>>
>> * Section 5 talks about “input data” for the hash & fingerprint calculation. What the “input data” exactly is becomes obvious after reading the Appendix A. However, for non-TLS WG activist it was not obvious from the first sight. Suggest adding a forward reference to Appendix A example.
>>
>> * Section 6 uses [0], [1], .. [4]. While these are perfectly correct they can be mixed with references in the first sight -> few seconds of confusion ;) I would suggest using (0), .. (4).
>>
>> * The document uses referencing all styles “RFC 7250 [RFC7250]”, “RFC 7250” and “[RFC7250]”. Pick one.
>>
>> * It is unclear to me what happens & what are the procedures when two different “input data”s generate the same fingerprint.
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>

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