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From: "Roni Even" <ron.even.tlv@gmail.com>
To: <draft-ietf-ancp-pon.all@tools.ietf.org>
Date: Sun, 1 Apr 2012 18:34:54 +0300
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Cc: gen-art@ietf.org, 'IETF' <ietf@ietf.org>
Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART LC review of draft-ietf-ancp-pon-02
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I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on
Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Sorry for the late review due to IET meeting.

Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you
may receive.

 

Document: draft-ietf-ancp-pon-02

Reviewer: Roni Even

Review Date:2012-4-1

IETF LC End Date: 2012-3-30

IESG Telechat date:

 

Summary: This draft is ready for publication as an Informational RFC.

 

Major issues:

 

Minor issues:

 

Nits/editorial comments:

 

In section 4 "However, the broadcast capability on the PON enables the AN
(OLT) to send one copy on the PON as opposed to N  copies of a multicast
channel on the PON serving N premises being  receivers" I think the "being"
before the last word should be deleted

 

General editorial comment is about page breaks which can be better like
section 7 title is at the end of a page and the text is in the next page.
Also some of the figures and their descriptions are split between pages.

 


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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=3DEN-US link=3Dblue =
vlink=3Dpurple><div class=3DWordSection1><p class=3DMsoNormal>I am the =
assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on Gen-ART, =
please see the FAQ at &lt;<a =
href=3D"http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq" =
target=3D"_blank">http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq=
</a>&gt;.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=3DMsoNormal>Sorry for the late review =
due to IET meeting.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=3DMsoNormal>Please resolve =
these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may =
receive.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span lang=3DFR =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Document: =
</span><span lang=3DFR =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>draft-ietf-=
ancp-pon-02</span><span lang=3DFR =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p></o:p>=
</span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Reviewer: =
Roni Even<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Review =
Date:2012&#8211;4&#8211;1<o:p></o:p></span></p><p =
class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>IETF LC =
End Date: 2012&#8211;3&#8211;30<o:p></o:p></span></p><p =
class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>IESG =
Telechat date:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Summary: =
This draft is ready for publication as an Informational </span><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>RFC</span><=
span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>.<o:p></o:p=
></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Major =
issues:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Minor =
issues:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>Nits/editor=
ial comments:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>In section =
4 &#8221;</span><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>However, =
the broadcast capability on the PON enables the AN (OLT) to send one =
copy on the PON as opposed to N&nbsp; copies of a multicast channel on =
the PON serving N premises being&nbsp; receivers&#8221; I think the =
&#8220;being&#8221; before the last word should be =
deleted<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;=
</o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoPlainText><span =
style=3D'font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"'>General =
editorial comment is about page breaks which can be better like section =
7 title is at the end of a page and the text is in the next page. Also =
some of the figures and their descriptions are split between =
pages.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=3DMsoNormal><span lang=3DHE =
dir=3DRTL =
style=3D'font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></span></p></=
div></body></html>
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