Re: [I2nsf] WGLC for draft-ietf-i2nsf-registration-dm-17

[Donald Eastlake <[e-mail]>]

I have looked at this draft and support publication. (Well, actually I
looked at draft-ietf-i2nsf-registration-interface-19.)

I like the clear top-down data model

Some minor suggestions:

Section 1: Expand DMS on first occurrence (it is currently expanded on 2nd
occurance)

Section 2: Maybe add a reference for OSI: "ISO/IEC 7498-4:1989 --
Information technology -- Open Systems Interconnection -- Basic Reference
Model: Naming and addressing".

Section 4.1.1.1, in the last two sentences: "two cases, outbound, inbound."
-> "two cases: outbound and inbound." and "two information can" -> "two
information items can".

Section 5.1.2, at the top of page 9: "following purposes." -> "following
purposes:"

Section 7 (three times): "illegally modifying this" -> "modifying this
without authorization".

Section 7: "deteriorate" -> "reduce"

Thanks,
Donald
===============================
 Donald E. Eastlake 3rd   [phone] (cell)
 2386 Panoramic Circle, Apopka, FL 32703 USA
 [e-mail]

On Sat, Jun 11, 2022 at 3:13 AM Linda Dunbar
<[e-mail]> <&lt;[e-mail]&gt;>
wrote:
Hello Working Group,

Many thanks to the authors of draft-ietf-i2nsf-registration-dm-17 to
address all the comments from YANG Doctor review, SecDir review and
OpsDIR review.

This email starts a three weeks Working Group Last Call on
draft-ietf-i2nsf-registration-dm-17
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-i2nsf-registration-interface-dm/

This poll runs until July 1, 2021.

We are also polling for knowledge of any undisclosed IPR that applies
to this Document, to ensure that IPR has been disclosed in compliance
with IETF IPR rules (see RFCs 3979, 4879, 3669 and 5378 for more
details).
If you are listed as an Author or a Contributor of this Document,
please respond to this email and indicate whether or not you are aware
of any relevant undisclosed IPR. The Document won't progress without
answers from all the Authors and Contributors.

If you are not listed as an Author or a Contributor, then please
explicitly respond only if you are aware of any IPR that has not yet
been disclosed in conformance with IETF rules.

Thank you.

Linda