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Re: Bad/Good ideas and damage control by experienced participants

Keith Moore <moore@network-heretics.com> Wed, 22 June 2022 19:09 UTC

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Date: Wed, 22 Jun 2022 15:09:11 -0400
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Subject: Re: Bad/Good ideas and damage control by experienced participants
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From: Keith Moore <moore@network-heretics.com>
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On 6/22/22 13:42, Miles Fidelman wrote:

> How much more effective it would be if someone posted a periodic 
> "netiquitte reminder," and maybe "how to ask good questions / craft 
> substantive responses" post -- and then folks took rude people to task 
> PRIVATELY.

IMO that would destroy what value IETF still has by having a chilling 
effect on technical discussion.    Taking "rude" people to task is 
almost never helpful; it just increases the overall level of hostility 
in IETF.

If you want to offer private feedback, maybe start by trying to 
understand the position of the person who is so frustrated that it 
causes them to be "rude".   In a great many cases you might find that 
they're not being heard or are otherwise being slighted by others, at 
least in their perceptions.   Also keep in mind that private feedback is 
most useful when it comes from someone whom the receiver respects.

People can say what they like in private email, but I suggest NOT 
"taking people to task", but rather listening.   Then maybe that person 
can figure out a better way to say what they're trying to say, ideally 
without being prompted for how to do that.

Keith

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