Re: [ippm] Request for reviews of draft-ietf-ippm-pam

Hi Bjørn,
thank you for your comments and suggestions. Will use them in the next
version of the draft. Please find my notes below tagged GIM>>.

Regards,
Greg

On Thu, Apr 20, 2023 at 1:20 AM Bjørn Ivar Teigen <bjorn@domos.no> wrote:

> Hi Marcus, IPPM,
>
> I've read the document. My overall impression is very good. I did find a
> few minor nits:
>
> Introduction: Essentially, the absence of what is, in other contexts, is
> called a defect. (One too many "is" in this sentence?)
>
GIM>> Perhaps minor editorial update:
OLD TEXT:
   Essentially, the
   absence of what is, in other contexts, is called a defect.
NEW TEXT:
   The absence of such capacity in other contexts is called a defect.
WDYT?

> Section 3.1: decamillisecond is an odd choice of unit.
>
GIM>> It is used as an example. What would you suggest, perhaps nanosecond?

> Section 3.1: "defitions" should be definitions
> Section 3.2: "Time since the last SVI (e.g., since last violated ms, since
> last violated second)" should be "Time since the last SVI (e.g., since last
> severely violated ms, since last severely violated second)"
>
GIM>> Thank you, agree.

> Section 4 claims, "The definition of histogram metrics is for further
> study (see section 6)", but there is no discussion of this in section 6
>
GIM>> Good catch, thank you. Would the following re-wording make it clearer:
OLD TEXT:
   The definition of histogram metrics is for further study
   (see Section 6).
NEW TEXT:
    The definition of histogram metrics is outside the scope
     of this document but could be considered for future work
     along with topics discussed in Section 6.

>
> I find the contribution interesting and useful and will be following this
> work in the future.
>
> Cheers,
> Bjørn
>
> On Wed, 19 Apr 2023 at 17:08, Marcus Ihlar <marcus.ihlar=
> 40ericsson.com@dmarc.ietf.org> wrote:
>
>> Hi IPPM,
>>
>> During the IPPM session at IETF 116 the authors of  draft-ietf-ippm-pam
>> expressed that they believe the document is ready for WGLC.
>>
>> However, since this  document was adopted quite recently we’d like to ask
>> the WG to take some time to read the document and provide feedback.
>>
>>
>>
>> In response to this mail, please indicate whether you’ve read the
>> document along with any feedback you might have.
>>
>>
>>
>> Note that this is not an official working group last call.
>>
>>
>>
>> The document can be found here:
>>
>> https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-ippm-pam/
>>
>>
>>
>> HTML version:
>>
>> https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-ippm-pam-01.html
>>
>>
>>
>> BR
>>
>> Marcus
>> _______________________________________________
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>> ippm@ietf.org
>> https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/ippm
>>
>
>
> --
> Dr. Bjørn Ivar Teigen, Ph.D.
> Head of Research
> +47 47335952 | bjorn@domos.ai | www.domos.ai
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