Re: [pim] IPR for draft-ietf-pim-msdp-yang

[Stig Venaas <[e-mail]>]

Hi

It looks like the only contributor/author we are missing an IPR
statement from now is Yisong Liu.

Yisong, can you please state whether you are aware of any IPR for this draft,

Thanks,
Stig

On Sun, Oct 27, 2019 at 6:47 PM <[e-mail]> wrote:
>
>
> Hi, Stig
>
> I don't know any other undisclosed IPR about draft-ietf-pim-msdp-yang.
>
> Thanks
>
> Benchong Xu
>
>
> 原始邮件
> 发件人：[e-mail] <[e-mail]>
> 收件人：[e-mail] <[e-mail]>;
> 日 期 ：2019年10月24日 03:01
> 主 题 ：pim Digest, Vol 186, Issue 17
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>    1. AD Review of draft-ietf-pim-msdp-yang-06 (Alvaro Retana)
>
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Message: 1
> Date: Wed, 23 Oct 2019 09:17:03 -0700
> From: Alvaro Retana <[e-mail]>
> To: [e-mail]
> Cc: Stig Venaas <[e-mail]>, [e-mail], [e-mail]
> Subject: [pim] AD Review of draft-ietf-pim-msdp-yang-06
> Message-ID:
>     <CAMMESswFDHY=14EBQxRczS=qTVDTx1EuqTkUT48_Py26bu=[e-mail]>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="UTF-8"
>
> Dear authors:
>
> I just finished reviewing this document. ?I don't have a lot of
> comments on the model itself (please see below), but the document
> needs significant work to live up to rfc8407 (Guidelines for YANG
> Documents) and the specific requirements mentioned there for YANG
> documents. ?In general, compare this document with
> draft-ietf-pim-igmp-mld-yang (which was written by almost the same
> author team). ?Items from rfc8407 that are not addressed in this
> document include:
>
> ?"A terminology section MUST be present if any terms are defined in the
> ?document or if any terms are imported from other documents." ?Is there no
> ?terminology defined in rfc3618 (or elsewhere) that is used in this document
> ?and useful to highlight?
>
> ?"If YANG tree diagrams are used, then an informative reference to the YANG
> ?tree diagrams specification MUST be included in the document."
>
> ?"If the module or modules defined by the specification imports definitions
> ?from other modules...or are always implemented in conjunction with other
> ?modules, then those facts MUST be noted in the overview section...Section 2.3
> ?of [RFC8349] for an example of this overview section."
>
> ?The Security Considerations "MUST be patterned after the latest approved
> ?template (available at
> ?<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/ops/wiki/yang-security-guidelines>)." ?See also
> ?some comments on the Security Consideration section itself.
>
> ?"For every import or include statement that appears in a module contained in
> ?the specification that identifies a module in a separate document, a
> ?corresponding normative reference to that document MUST appear in the
> ?Normative References section."
>
> ?"For every normative reference statement that appears in a module contained in
> ?the specification that identifies a separate document, a corresponding
> ?normative reference to that document SHOULD appear in the Normative References
> ?section."
>
> ?"Each specification that defines one or more modules SHOULD contain usage
> ?examples, either throughout the document or in an appendix."
>
>
> Please also check idnits:
> https://tools.ietf.org/idnits?url=https://tools.ietf.org/id/draft-ietf-pim-msdp-yang-06.txt
>
>
> I will wait for a revision, and for any major issues identified inline
> before starting the IETF LC.
>
> Thanks!
>
> Alvaro.
>
>
> [Line numbers from idnits.]
>
> 2    PIM WG ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Xufeng. Liu
> 3    Internet-Draft ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Volta Networks
> 4    Intended status: Standards Track ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Zheng. Zhang
> 5    Expires: October 25, 2019 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?ZTE Corporation
> 6     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Anish. Peter
> 7     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Individual contributor
> 8     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Mahesh. Sivakumar
> 9     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Juniper networks
> 10     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Feng. Guo
> 11     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Huawei Technologies
> 12     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Pete. McAllister
> 13     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Metaswitch Networks
>
> [nit] For all the authors, "The author's name (initial followed by
> family name)..." (rfc7322).
>
>
> .....
> 71    1. ?Introduction
> .....
> 78     ? This model is designed to be used along with other multicast YANG
> 79     ? models such as PIM, which are not covered in this document.
>
> [major] Is the PIM model required? ?I didn't find an indication in the
> model that other models were needed.
>
> [nit] A reference to the PIM model would be nice.
>
> 81    2. ?Design of the Data Model
>
> 83     ? This model imports and augments ietf-routing YANG model defined in
> 84     ? [RFC8349]. ?Both configuration data nodes and state data nodes of
> 85     ? [RFC8349] are augmented. ?The configuration data nodes cover global
> 86     ? configuration attributes and per peer configuration attributes. ?The
> 87     ? state data nodes include global, per peer, and source-active
> 88     ? information. ?The container "msdp" is the top level container in this
> 89     ? data model. ?The presence of this container is expected to enable
> 90     ? MSDP protocol functionality. ?No notification is defined in this
> 91     ? model.
>
> [nit] s/augments ietf-routing YANG model/augments the ietf-routing YANG model
>
> 93    module: ietf-msdp
> 94     ?augment /rt:routing/rt:control-plane-protocols:
> 95     ? ?+--rw msdp!
> 96     ? ? ? +--rw global
> 97     ? ? ? | ?+--rw tcp-connection-source? ? if:interface-ref
> 98     ? ? ? | ?+--rw default-peer* [peer-addr prefix-policy]
> {global-default-peer,global-default-peer-policy}?
> 99     ? ? ? | ?| ?+--rw peer-addr ? ? ? ?-> ../../../peers/peer/address
> 100     ? ? ? | ?| ?+--rw prefix-policy ? ?string
> 101     ? ? ? | ?+--rw originating-rp
> 102     ? ? ? | ?| ?+--rw interface? ? if:interface-ref
> 103     ? ? ? | ?+--rw sa-filter
> 104     ? ? ? | ?| ?+--rw in? ? ?string
> 105     ? ? ? | ?| ?+--rw out? ? string
>
> [major] The use of "string" to point at the policy (for sa-filter,
> prefix-policy) caught my attention. ?Later the text says that "The
> definition of such a policy is outside the scope of this document."
> Ok...draft-ietf-rtgwg-policy-model ?(Routing Policy Model) does define
> the policy -- why is that work not used/referenced? ?I noticed that
> there is an unused reference to I-D.ietf-rtgwg-policy-model, which was
> added in -05, when the "out of scope" text was also added...
>
>
> .....
> 111     ? ? ? | ? ? +--rw authentication
> 112     ? ? ? | ? ? | ?+--rw (authentication-type)?
> 113     ? ? ? | ? ? | ? ? +--:(key-chain) {peer-key-chain}?
> 114     ? ? ? | ? ? | ? ? | ?+--rw key-chain? ? ? ? ? ?key-chain:key-chain-ref
> 115     ? ? ? | ? ? | ? ? +--:(password)
> 116     ? ? ? | ? ? | ? ? ? ?+--rw key? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?string
> 117     ? ? ? | ? ? | ? ? ? ?+--rw crypto-algorithm? ? identityref
>
> [major] rfc3618 only requires Keyed MD5 support...which I assume
> corresponds to the "password" option. ?Is that correct? ?Is the MSDP
> operation with a key-chain specified somewhere else? ?Are we missing a
> reference (in the model)?
>
> 118     ? ? ? | ? ? +--rw enable? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?boolean {peer-admin-enable}?
> 119     ? ? ? | ? ? +--rw tcp-connection-source? ? if:interface-ref
>
> [minor] Maybe it's my poor understanding of YANG... ?It's not clear to
> me whether the global configuration for tcp-connection-source has
> precedence over the peer-specific configuration or not. ?Given that
> tcp-connection-source is optional, and that several of the parameters
> below depend on the peer configuration, it seems to me that some
> information may not be present if only the global piece is configured.
>
> [Again, this comment may simply reflect my misunderstanding of YANG.
> If that is the case, just tell me and we can move on. :-) ]
>
>
> .....
> 212    5. ?MSDP RPC
>
> 214     ? The RPC part is used to define some useful and ordinary operations of
> 215     ? protocol management. ?Network manager can delete all the information
> 216     ? from a given peer by using the clear-peer rpc. ?And network manager
> 217     ? can delete a given SA cache information by clear-sa-cache rpc.
>
> [nit] s/manager/managers
>
> [major] There is no NMDA-related statement.
>
> 219    6. ?MSDP YANG model
>
> [major] Add text extracting all the reference statements (to be listed
> in the References secion): "This module references..." ?All these
> should be Normative.
>
> 221    <CODE BEGINS> file "ietf-msdp.yang"
>
> [major] From rfc8407:
>
> ? ?The "<CODE BEGINS>" tag SHOULD be followed by a string identifying
> ? ?the file name specified in Section 5.2 of [RFC7950]. ?The name string
> ? ?form that includes the revision date SHOULD be used. ?The revision
> ? ?date MUST match the date used in the most recent revision of the
> ? ?module.
>
> IOW, the file name should be [e-mail] ?Please make
> sure this matches the date in the revision statement below.
>
>
> .....
> 239     ? ? import ietf-routing {
> 240     ? ? ? prefix "rt";
> 241     ? ? ? reference "RFC8022";
>
> [major] s/8022/8349
>
> 242     ? ? }
>
> 244     ? ? import ietf-interfaces {
> 245     ? ? ? prefix "if";
> 246     ? ? ? reference "RFC7223";
>
> [major] s/7223/8343
>
> 247     ? ? }
>
> 249     ? ? import ietf-ip {
> 250     ? ? ? prefix "ip";
> 251     ? ? ? reference "RFC7277";
>
> [major] s/7277/8344
>
>
> .....
> 264     ? ? organization
> 265     ? ? ? "IETF PIM(Protocols for IP Multicast) Working Group";
>
> [nit] s/PIM(Protocols/PIM (Protocols
>
>
> .....
> 289     ? ? ? ?description
> 290     ? ? ? ? "The module defines the YANG definitions for MSDP.
>
> 292     ? ? ? ? ?Copyright (c) 2018 IETF Trust and the persons
> 293     ? ? ? ? ?identified as authors of the code. ?All rights reserved.
>
> 295     ? ? ? ? ?Redistribution and use in source and binary forms, with or
> 296     ? ? ? ? ?without modification, is permitted pursuant to, and
> 297     ? ? ? ? ?subject to the license terms contained in, the Simplified
> 298     ? ? ? ? ?BSD License set forth in Section 4.c of the IETF Trust's
> 299     ? ? ? ? ?Legal Provisions Relating to IETF Documents
> 300     ? ? ? ? ?(http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info).
> 301     ? ? ? ? ?This version of this YANG module is part of RFC 3618; see
> 302     ? ? ? ? ?the RFC itself for full legal notices.";
>
> [major] "this YANG module is part of RFC 3618" ?No, it is part of this
> RFC-to-be; use "RFC XXXX" instead.
>
> 304     ? ? revision 2018-10-20 {
>
> 305     ? ? ? description
> 306     ? ? ? ? "Initial revision.";
> 307     ? ? ? reference
> 308     ? ? ? ? "RFC XXXX: A YANG Data Model for MSDP.
> 309     ? ? ? ? ?RFC 3618: Multicast Source Discovery Protocol (MSDP).
> 310     ? ? ? ? ?RFC 4624: Multicast Source Discovery Protocol (MSDP) MIB";
> 311     ? ? }
>
> [major] The only reference should be RFC XXXX. ?The others are not
> where the module is included...
>
>
> .....
> 477     ? ? ? container originating-rp {
> 478     ? ? ? ? description
> 479     ? ? ? ? ? "The container of Originating RP.";
> 480     ? ? ? ? leaf interface {
> 481     ? ? ? ? ? type if:interface-ref;
> 482     ? ? ? ? ? must "/if:interfaces/if:interface[if:name = current()]/"
> 483     ? ? ? ? ? ? + "ip:ipv4" {
> 484     ? ? ? ? ? ? description
> 485     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? "The interface must have IPv4 enabled.";
> 486     ? ? ? ? ? }
> 487     ? ? ? ? ? description
> 488     ? ? ? ? ? ? "Reference to an entry in the global interface
> 489     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?list.
> 490     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?IP address of the interface is used in the RP field of
> 491     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?an SA message entry. When Anycast RPs are used, all
> 492     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?RPs use the same IP address. This parameter can be
> 493     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?used to define a unique IP address for the RP of each
> 494     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?MSDP peer.
> 495     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?By default, the software uses the RP address of the
> 496     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?local system.";
>
> [nit] s/address of the interface is used/address of the interface used
>
>
> .....
> 555     ? ? ? container timer {
> 556     ? ? ? ? description "Timer attributes.";
> 557     ? ? ? ? leaf connect-retry-interval {
> 558     ? ? ? ? ? type uint16;
> 559     ? ? ? ? ? units seconds;
> 560     ? ? ? ? ? default 30;
> 561     ? ? ? ? ? description "Peer timer for connect-retry,
> 562     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?SHOULD be set to 30 seconds.";
> 563     ? ? ? ? }
>
> [major] BCP14 is not referenced, nor is the template used. ?This is
> the only instance of rfc2119 keywords that I found. ?If you want to
> keep the Normative language, then please include the template and
> references.
>
>
> .....
> 591     ? ? ? uses ttl-threshold;
>
> [?] The previous entry (line 510) reads:
>
> ? ? ?uses ttl-threshold {
> ? ? ? ?if-feature global-ttl-threshold;
> ? ? ?}
>
> Should this mention of ttl-threshold be similar?
>
>
>
> .....
> 639     ? ? ? leaf is-default-peer {
> 640     ? ? ? ? type boolean;
> 641     ? ? ? ? config false;
> 642     ? ? ? ? description "If this peer is default peer.";
>
> [minor] s/If this peer is default peer./'true' if this peer is a default peer.
>
>
> .....
> 738     ? ? grouping ttl-threshold {
> 739     ? ? ? description "Attribute to configure TTL threshold.";
> 740     ? ? ? leaf ttl-threshold {
> 741     ? ? ? ? type uint8 {
> 742     ? ? ? ? ? range 1..255;
> 743     ? ? ? ? }
> 744     ? ? ? ? description "Maximum number of hops data packets can
> 745     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?traverse before being dropped.";
> 746     ? ? ? }
> 747     ? ? } // sa-ttl-threshold
>
> [nit] s/sa-ttl-threshold/ttl-threshold
>
>
> .....
> 806     ? ? ? ? ? list peer {
> 807     ? ? ? ? ? ? key "address";
> 808     ? ? ? ? ? ? description
> 809     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? "List of MSDP peers.";
> 810     ? ? ? ? ? ? leaf address {
> 811     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? type inet:ipv4-address;
> 812     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? description
> 813     ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? "The address of peer";
>
> [nit] s/address of peer/address of the peer
>
>
> .....
> 955    7. ?Security Considerations
>
> [major] Please update this section with the appropriate references
> (using the latest template):
> https://trac.ietf.org/trac/ops/wiki/yang-security-guidelines
>
>
> .....
> 970     ? There are a number of data nodes defined in this YANG module that are
> 971     ? writable/creatable/deletable (i.e., config true, which is the
> 972     ? default). ?These data nodes may be considered sensitive or vulnerable
> 973     ? in some network environments. ?Write operations (e.g., edit-config)
> 974     ? to these data nodes without proper protection can have a negative
> 975     ? effect on network operations. ?For MSDP, the ability to modify MSDP
> 976     ? configuration will allow the unexpected MSDP peer establishment and
> 977     ? unexpected SA information learning and advertisement. ?The "password"
> 978     ? field is also a sensitive readable configuration, the unauthorized
> 979     ? reading function may lead to the password leaking. ?The security
> 980     ? considerations of MSDP [RFC3618] are applicable.
>
> [major] Please follow draft-ietf-pim-igmp-mld-yang
> (draft-ietf-ospf-yang is also a good example) in calling out
> specifics...before the Security ADs use a DISCUSS.
>
> [major] Information about the readable nodes is missing.
>
>
> .....
> 989    8. ?IANA Considerations
>
> 991     ? The IANA is requested to assign two new URIs from the IETF XML
> 992     ? registry ([RFC3688]). ?Authors are suggesting the following URI:
>
> [nit] s/([RFC3688])/[RFC3688]
>
> 994     ? URI: urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:yang:ietf-msdp
>
> 996     ? Registrant Contact: PIM WG
>
> [minor] s/PIM WG/The IESG
>
> 998     ? XML: N/A, the requested URI is an XML namespace
>
> 1000     ? This document also requests one new YANG module name in the YANG
> 1001     ? Module Names registry ([RFC6020]) with the following suggestion:
>
> [nit] s/([RFC6020])/[RFC6020]
>
>
> .....
> 1022    11. ?Normative References
>
> 1024     ? [I-D.ietf-netmod-rfc6087bis]
> 1025     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Bierman, A., "Guidelines for Authors and Reviewers of YANG
> 1026     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Data Model Documents", draft-ietf-netmod-rfc6087bis-20
> 1027     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?(work in progress), March 2018.
>
> == Outdated reference: draft-ietf-netmod-rfc6087bis has been published as
> ? ?RFC 8407
>
> [minor] This reference (and the one to rfc6087) are not used.
>
>
> .....
> 1047     ? [RFC5246] ?Dierks, T. and E. Rescorla, "The Transport Layer Security
> 1048     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?(TLS) Protocol Version 1.2", RFC 5246,
> 1049     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?DOI 10.17487/RFC5246, August 2008,
> 1050     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?<https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc5246>.
>
> ** Obsolete normative reference: RFC 5246 (Obsoleted by RFC 8446)
>
>
> .....
> 1070     ? [RFC6536] ?Bierman, A. and M. Bjorklund, "Network Configuration
> 1071     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Protocol (NETCONF) Access Control Model", RFC 6536,
> 1072     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?DOI 10.17487/RFC6536, March 2012,
> 1073     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?<https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc6536>.
>
> ** Obsolete normative reference: RFC 6536 (Obsoleted by RFC 8341)
>
>
> .....
> 1079     ? [RFC7223] ?Bjorklund, M., "A YANG Data Model for Interface
> 1080     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Management", RFC 7223, DOI 10.17487/RFC7223, May 2014,
> 1081     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?<https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc7223>.
>
> ** Obsolete normative reference: RFC 7223 (Obsoleted by RFC 8343)
>
> 1083     ? [RFC7277] ?Bjorklund, M., "A YANG Data Model for IP Management",
> 1084     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?RFC 7277, DOI 10.17487/RFC7277, June 2014,
> 1085     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?<https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc7277>.
>
> ** Obsolete normative reference: RFC 7277 (Obsoleted by RFC 8344)
>
>
> 1087     ? [RFC8022] ?Lhotka, L. and A. Lindem, "A YANG Data Model for Routing
> 1088     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?Management", RFC 8022, DOI 10.17487/RFC8022, November
> 1089     ? ? ? ? ? ? ?2016, <https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc8022>.
>
> ** Obsolete normative reference: RFC 8022 (Obsoleted by RFC 8349)
>
>
>
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