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From: "Andrew G. Malis" <agmalis@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, 19 Feb 2019 07:57:20 -0500
Message-ID: <CAA=duU0_mbAbx=yjAJJ-BWtgyAqqhNC=fX7=ik_noAu8KKxkNQ@mail.gmail.com>
To: Dhruv Dhody <dhruv.dhody@huawei.com>
Cc: "<rtg-ads@ietf.org>" <rtg-ads@ietf.org>,
 "rtg-dir@ietf.org" <rtg-dir@ietf.org>, "pce@ietf.org" <pce@ietf.org>, 
 "draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp.all@ietf.org"
 <draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp.all@ietf.org>
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Subject: Re: [RTG-DIR] [Pce] RtgDir review:
 draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-10.txt
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Dhruv,

That was quick! :-) All looks good except you missed two comments:

8. Section 6.5, first paragraph: In the second line, replace the comma with
a period and capitalize the following "this".

9. Section 6.5, last paragraph: A right ")" is missing at the end of the
paragraph.

Thanks,
Andy


On Tue, Feb 19, 2019 at 12:15 AM Dhruv Dhody <dhruv.dhody@huawei.com> wrote:

> Hi Andy,
>
>
>
> Thanks for your review. Your comments are incorporated in the -11 version.
>
>
>
> The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
>
> https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp/
>
>
>
> A diff from the previous version is available at:
>
> https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-11
>
>
>
> Regards,
>
> Dhruv
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Dhruv Dhody
>
> Lead Architect
>
> Network Business Line
>
> Huawei Technologies India Pvt. Ltd.
>
> Survey No. 37, Next to EPIP Area, Kundalahalli, Whitefield
>
> Bengaluru, Karnataka - 560066
>
> Tel: + 91-80-49160700 Ext 71583 II Email: dhruv.dhody@huawei.com
>
> [image: Huawei-small]
>
> This e-mail and its attachments contain confidential information from
> HUAWEI, which
> is intended only for the person or entity whose address is listed above.
> Any use of the
> information contained herein in any way (including, but not limited to,
> total or partial
> disclosure, reproduction, or dissemination) by persons other than the
> intended
> recipient(s) is prohibited. If you receive this e-mail in error, please
> notify the sender by
> phone or email immediately and delete it!
>
>
>
> *From:* Pce [mailto:pce-bounces@ietf.org] *On Behalf Of *Andrew G. Malis
> *Sent:* 19 February 2019 02:34
> *To:* <rtg-ads@ietf.org> <rtg-ads@ietf.org>
> *Cc:* rtg-dir@ietf.org; pce@ietf.org;
> draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp.all@ietf.org
> *Subject:* [Pce] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-10.txt
>
>
>
> Hello,
>
> I have been selected as the Routing Directorate reviewer for this draft.
> The Routing Directorate seeks to review all routing or routing-related
> drafts as they pass through IETF last call and IESG review, and sometimes
> on special request. The purpose of the review is to provide assistance to
> the Routing ADs. For more information about the Routing Directorate, please
> see http://trac.tools.ietf.org/area/rtg/trac/wiki/RtgDir
>
> Although these comments are primarily for the use of the Routing ADs, it
> would be helpful if you could consider them along with any other IETF Last
> Call comments that you receive, and strive to resolve them through
> discussion or by updating the draft.
>
> Document: draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-10.txt
> Reviewer: Andy Malis
> Review Date: 18 February 2019
> IETF LC End Date: N/A (in preparation for IETF LC)
> Intended Status: Standards Track
>
> Summary:
>
> This document is basically ready for publication, but has nits that should
> be considered prior to publication.
>
> Comments:
>
> It was very easy to follow the draft. Excellent work by all involved.
>
> Major issues:
>
> No major issues found.
>
> Minor Issues:
>
> No minor issues found.
>
> Nits:
>
> 1. Section 3..1, second paragraph:
>
> Replace:
> For P2MP this is an added advantage, where the size of message is much
> larger.
>
> With:
> For P2MP, where the size of message is much larger, this is an added
> advantage.
>
> 2. Section 5.1, fifth paragraph:
>
> Replace:
> Path Computation LSP Initiate Message (PCInitiate):  is a PCEP
>
> With:
> Path Computation LSP Initiate Message (PCInitiate): PCInitiate is a PCEP
>
> 3. Section 5.2, first paragraph:
>
> Replace:
> PCEP speakers advertise Stateful capability via STATEFUL-PCE-CAPABILITY
> TLV in open message.
>
> With:
> PCEP speakers advertise Stateful capability via the
> STATEFUL-PCE-CAPABILITY TLV in the OPEN object.
>
> 4. Section 5.2, third paragraph (N Flag): In two places, replace "changes"
> with "change".
>
> 5.. Section 5.3, first paragraph: Expand "LSR" (Label Switching Router) on
> first use. It's not on the RFC Editor's list of well-known acronyms.
>
> 6. Section 5.3, second paragraph: Expand "PCED" (PCE Discovery TLV) on
> first use.
>
> 7. Section 6.2, last paragraph: A right ")" is missing at the end of the
> paragraph.
>
> 8. Section 6.5, first paragraph: In the second line, replace the comma
> with a period and capitalize the following "this".
>
> 9. Section 6.5, last paragraph: A right ")" is missing at the end of the
> paragraph.
>
> 10. Section 8, second paragraph: Add the word "The" to the start of the
> paragraph.
>
> 11. Section 11.2, first paragraph. Change "and a registry was created" to
> "and the STATEFUL-PCE-CAPABILITY TLV Flag Field subregistry was created"
>
> 12. Section 11.3, first paragraph: Change "and a registry was created" to
> "and the LSP Object Flag Field subregistry was created"
>
> Regards,
> Andy
>
>
>

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Content-Type: text/html; charset="UTF-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

<div dir=3D"ltr">Dhruv,<div><br></div><div>That was quick! :-) All looks=C2=
=A0good except you missed two comments:</div><div><br></div><div>8. Section=
 6.5, first paragraph: In the second line, replace the comma with a period =
and capitalize the following &quot;this&quot;.<br><br>9. Section 6.5, last =
paragraph: A right &quot;)&quot; is missing at the end of the paragraph.<br=
></div><div><br></div><div>Thanks,</div><div>Andy</div><div><br></div></div=
><br><div class=3D"gmail_quote"><div dir=3D"ltr" class=3D"gmail_attr">On Tu=
e, Feb 19, 2019 at 12:15 AM Dhruv Dhody &lt;<a href=3D"mailto:dhruv.dhody@h=
uawei.com">dhruv.dhody@huawei.com</a>&gt; wrote:<br></div><blockquote class=
=3D"gmail_quote" style=3D"margin:0px 0px 0px 0.8ex;border-left:1px solid rg=
b(204,204,204);padding-left:1ex">





<div lang=3D"EN-US">
<div class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731WordSection1">
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText">Hi Andy, <u></u><u></u=
></p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></=
p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText">Thanks for your review=
. Your comments are incorporated in the -11 version.
<u></u><u></u></p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></=
p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText">The IETF datatracker s=
tatus page for this draft is:<u></u><u></u></p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText"><a href=3D"https://dat=
atracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp/" target=3D"_blank">=
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp/</a><u></=
u><u></u></p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></=
p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText">A diff from the previo=
us version is available at:<u></u><u></u></p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText"><a href=3D"https://www=
.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=3Ddraft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-11" target=3D"_bl=
ank">https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=3Ddraft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-1=
1</a><u></u><u></u></p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></=
p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText">Regards,<u></u><u></u>=
</p>
<p class=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731MsoPlainText">Dhruv<u></u><u></u></p=
>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:&quot;Treb=
uchet MS&quot;,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></span>=
</p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:&quot;Treb=
uchet MS&quot;,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></span>=
</p>
<div style=3D"border-top:none;border-right:none;border-left:none;border-bot=
tom:1pt solid windowtext;padding:0cm 0cm 1pt">
<p class=3D"MsoNormal" style=3D"border:none;padding:0cm"><span style=3D"fon=
t-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(91,155,213)"><u></u>=
=C2=A0<u></u></span></p>
</div>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(91,155,213)">Dhruv Dhody
<u></u><u></u></span></p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Lead Architect<u></u><u></u></span></p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Network Business Line<u></u><u></u></span></=
p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Huawei Technologies India Pvt. Ltd.<u></u><u=
></u></span></p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Survey No. 37, Next to EPIP Area, Kundalahal=
li, Whitefield<u></u><u></u></span></p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Bengaluru, Karnataka - 560066
<u></u><u></u></span></p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sa=
ns-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Tel: + 91-80-49160700 Ext 71583 II Email:
</span><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:r=
gb(91,155,213)"><a href=3D"mailto:dhruv.dhody@huawei.com" target=3D"_blank"=
><span style=3D"color:rgb(5,99,193)">dhruv.dhody@huawei.com</span></a><u></=
u><u></u></span></p>
<div style=3D"border-top:none;border-right:none;border-left:none;border-bot=
tom:1pt solid windowtext;padding:0cm 0cm 1pt">
<p class=3D"MsoNormal" style=3D"border:none;padding:0cm"><span style=3D"fon=
t-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(91,155,213)"><img bord=
er=3D"0" width=3D"90" height=3D"90" id=3D"gmail-m_6296820019564623731Pictur=
e_x0020_1" src=3D"cid:16905d32fc94cff311" alt=3D"Huawei-small"></span><span=
 style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125=
)"><u></u><u></u></span></p>
</div>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:7.5pt;font-family:Arial,san=
s-serif;color:gray">This e-mail and its attachments contain confidential in=
formation from HUAWEI, which
<br>
is intended only for the person or entity whose address is listed above. An=
y use of the
<br>
information contained herein in any way (including, but not limited to, tot=
al or partial
<br>
disclosure, reproduction, or dissemination) by persons other than the inten=
ded <br>
recipient(s) is prohibited. If you receive this e-mail in error, please not=
ify the sender by
<br>
phone or email immediately and delete it!</span><span style=3D"font-size:11=
pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><u></u><u></u></spa=
n></p>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:&quot;Treb=
uchet MS&quot;,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></span>=
</p>
<div style=3D"border-top:none;border-right:none;border-bottom:none;border-l=
eft:1.5pt solid blue;padding:0cm 0cm 0cm 4pt">
<div>
<div style=3D"border-right:none;border-bottom:none;border-left:none;border-=
top:1pt solid rgb(225,225,225);padding:3pt 0cm 0cm">
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><b><span style=3D"font-size:11pt;font-family:Calibri=
,sans-serif">From:</span></b><span style=3D"font-size:11pt;font-family:Cali=
bri,sans-serif"> Pce [mailto:<a href=3D"mailto:pce-bounces@ietf.org" target=
=3D"_blank">pce-bounces@ietf.org</a>]
<b>On Behalf Of </b>Andrew G. Malis<br>
<b>Sent:</b> 19 February 2019 02:34<br>
<b>To:</b> &lt;<a href=3D"mailto:rtg-ads@ietf.org" target=3D"_blank">rtg-ad=
s@ietf.org</a>&gt; &lt;<a href=3D"mailto:rtg-ads@ietf.org" target=3D"_blank=
">rtg-ads@ietf.org</a>&gt;<br>
<b>Cc:</b> <a href=3D"mailto:rtg-dir@ietf.org" target=3D"_blank">rtg-dir@ie=
tf.org</a>; <a href=3D"mailto:pce@ietf.org" target=3D"_blank">pce@ietf.org<=
/a>; <a href=3D"mailto:draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp.all@ietf.org" targe=
t=3D"_blank">draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp.all@ietf.org</a><br>
<b>Subject:</b> [Pce] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-10.tx=
t<u></u><u></u></span></p>
</div>
</div>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></p>
<div>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal">Hello,<br>
<br>
I have been selected as the Routing Directorate reviewer for this draft. Th=
e Routing Directorate seeks to review all routing or routing-related drafts=
 as they pass through IETF last call and IESG review, and sometimes on spec=
ial request. The purpose of the
 review is to provide assistance to the Routing ADs. For more information a=
bout the Routing Directorate, please see
<a href=3D"http://trac.tools.ietf.org/area/rtg/trac/wiki/RtgDir" target=3D"=
_blank">http://trac.tools.ietf.org/area/rtg/trac/wiki/RtgDir</a><br>
<br>
Although these comments are primarily for the use of the Routing ADs, it wo=
uld be helpful if you could consider them along with any other IETF Last Ca=
ll comments that you receive, and strive to resolve them through discussion=
 or by updating the draft.<br>
<br>
Document: draft-ietf-pce-stateful-pce-p2mp-10.txt<br>
Reviewer: Andy Malis<br>
Review Date: 18 February 2019<br>
IETF LC End Date: N/A (in preparation for IETF LC)<br>
Intended Status: Standards Track<br>
<br>
Summary:<br>
<br>
This document is basically ready for publication, but has nits that should =
be considered prior to publication.<br>
<br>
Comments:<br>
<br>
It was very easy to follow the draft. Excellent work by all involved.<br>
<br>
Major issues:<br>
<br>
No major issues found.<br>
<br>
Minor Issues:<br>
<br>
No minor issues found.<br>
<br>
Nits:<br>
<br>
1. Section 3..1, second paragraph:<br>
<br>
Replace:<br>
For P2MP this is an added advantage, where the size of message is much larg=
er.<br>
<br>
With:<br>
For P2MP, where the size of message is much larger, this is an added advant=
age.<br>
<br>
2. Section 5.1, fifth paragraph:<br>
<br>
Replace:<br>
Path Computation LSP Initiate Message (PCInitiate): =C2=A0is a PCEP<br>
<br>
With:<br>
Path Computation LSP Initiate Message (PCInitiate): PCInitiate is a PCEP<br=
>
<br>
3. Section 5.2, first paragraph:<br>
<br>
Replace:<br>
PCEP speakers advertise Stateful capability via STATEFUL-PCE-CAPABILITY TLV=
 in open message.<br>
<br>
With:<br>
PCEP speakers advertise Stateful capability via the STATEFUL-PCE-CAPABILITY=
 TLV in the OPEN object.<br>
<br>
4. Section 5.2, third paragraph (N Flag): In two places, replace &quot;chan=
ges&quot; with &quot;change&quot;.<br>
<br>
5.. Section 5.3, first paragraph: Expand &quot;LSR&quot; (Label Switching R=
outer) on first use. It&#39;s not on the RFC Editor&#39;s list of well-know=
n acronyms.<br>
<br>
6. Section 5.3, second paragraph: Expand &quot;PCED&quot; (PCE Discovery TL=
V) on first use.<br>
<br>
7. Section 6.2, last paragraph: A right &quot;)&quot; is missing at the end=
 of the paragraph.<br>
<br>
8. Section 6.5, first paragraph: In the second line, replace the comma with=
 a period and capitalize the following &quot;this&quot;.<br>
<br>
9. Section 6.5, last paragraph: A right &quot;)&quot; is missing at the end=
 of the paragraph.<br>
<br>
10. Section 8, second paragraph: Add the word &quot;The&quot; to the start =
of the paragraph.<br>
<br>
11. Section 11.2, first paragraph. Change &quot;and a registry was created&=
quot; to &quot;and the STATEFUL-PCE-CAPABILITY TLV Flag Field subregistry w=
as created&quot;<br>
<br>
12. Section 11.3, first paragraph: Change &quot;and a registry was created&=
quot; to &quot;and the LSP Object Flag Field subregistry was created&quot;<=
br>
<br>
Regards,<br>
Andy<u></u><u></u></p>
<div>
<p class=3D"MsoNormal"><u></u>=C2=A0<u></u></p>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>

</blockquote></div>

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