[secdir] Secdir last call review of draft-ietf-raw-technologies-10

Shivan Sahib via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> Thu, 19 September 2024 07:45 UTC

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Subject: [secdir] Secdir last call review of draft-ietf-raw-technologies-10
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Reviewer: Shivan Sahib
Review result: Has Issues

I have reviewed draft-ietf-raw-technologies-10 document as part of the security
directorate's ongoing effort to review all IETF documents being processed by
the IESG. These comments were written primarily for the benefit of the security
area directors. Document editors and WG chairs should treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

The summary of the review is Ready with issues.

The document is an Informational draft that doesn't define any new behaviour
and instead simply provides an overview of reliable and available wireless
technology developments. The current "Security Considerations" section refers
readers to the individual security concerns of each technology. While the
document doesn't introduce any new security considerations, I do think
discussing the broader security considerations with these technologies would be
very useful to the reader of this document and the omission seems surprising. I
will leave it up to the ADs to see if this is something they want to block on.

Apart from that, some minor grammatical and text improvement issues:

1. Introduction
   s/A runtime distributed Path/a runtime distributed Path

2. Section 4.1
   The first paragraph of Section 4.1 reads like promotional material for IEEE,
   which seems unnecessary for an IETF document. Similarly, the descriptions of
   Wi-Fi Alliance and Avnu Alliance in this section also seem promotional.

3. Section 5.2.2.1.2:
   s/etc.../etc.