Re: [Softwires] I-D Action: draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp-11.txt

Nits found in draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp-11:

a. In sec. 4.4, "o  option-length: 4"

Per the format defined for OPTION_S46_V4V6BIND, the value of the
option-length should be variable. I guess the above text is wrongly copied
from other place.

b. In sec. 4.5, 
"  The OPTION_S46_PORTPARAMS option with an
   explicit PSID MUST be discarded if the S46 CE isn't configured with a
   full IPv4 address (e.g.  IPv4 prefix)."

I prefer to replace the above "a full IPv4 address" to be "a shared IPv4
address". We can get the address sharing information from the calculation on
the 'ea-len' and 'prefix4-len' got from OPTION_S46_RULE, i.e. PSID-length =
q = o - p = o - (32-r) != 0.  Right?

c. In sec. 4.1, 
"  o  F-Flag: 1 bit field that specifies whether the rule is to be used
      for forwarding (FMR).  If set, this rule is used as a FMR, if not
      set this rule is a BMR only and MUST NOT be used for forwarding.
      Note: A BMR can also be used as an FMR for forwarding if the
      F-flag is set.  The BMR rule is determined by a longest-prefix
      match of the Rule-IPv6-prefix against the End-User IPv6
      prefix(es)."

I guess if F-Flag=0, i.e. not set, this rule is a BMR only, and is not a
FMR. That might means hub & spoke mode, right? If yes, I guess we need more
words on the hub & spoke mode in this section. Right?

d. In sec. 8,
"  Such
   a client MUST include the S46 Container option(s) that it is
   configured for in its ORO in SOLICIT, REQUEST, RENEW, REBIND and
   INFORMATION-REQUEST messages. "

I prefer the above words could be " Such a client MUST include the codes of
the S46 Container option(s)...in its ORO...".

e. In sec. 4.5, 
"  o  offset: (PSID offset) 8 bits long field that specifies the numeric
      value for the S46 algorithm's excluded port range/offset bits
      (A-bits), as per section 5.1.1 of [I-D.ietf-softwire-map]. "

I prefer to replace the above "A-bits " to be "a-bits" per
I-D.ietf-softwire-map.  'A' looks like the value in the field, while 'a' is
the number of the bits.

f. In sec. 4.4,
"  o  bind-ipv6-prefix: a variable length field specifying the IPv6
      prefix or address for the S46. "

I prefer to replace the above "the S46" to be "the S46 CE". Right?

g. In sec. 3, 
"  MAP-E uses RFC2473 [RFC2473] IPv4 over IPv6 tunnelling,
   while MAP-T uses NAT64 [RFC6145] based translation."

We only need 1x RFC2473 here.  :-)

Best Regards,
Leaf

-----Original Message-----
From: Softwires [mailto:softwires-bounces@ietf.org] On Behalf Of
internet-drafts@ietf.org
Sent: Friday, November 14, 2014 5:52 PM
To: i-d-announce@ietf.org
Cc: softwires@ietf.org
Subject: [Softwires] I-D Action: draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp-11.txt

A New Internet-Draft is available from the on-line Internet-Drafts
directories.
 This draft is a work item of the Softwires Working Group of the IETF.

        Title           : DHCPv6 Options for configuration of Softwire
Address and Port Mapped Clients
        Authors         : Tomek Mrugalski
                          Ole Troan
                          Ian Farrer
                          Simon Perreault
                          Wojciech Dec
                          Congxiao Bao
                          Leaf Y. Yeh
                          Xiaohong Deng
	Filename        : draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp-11.txt
	Pages           : 18
	Date            : 2014-11-14

Abstract:
   This document specifies DHCPv6 options, termed Softwire46 options,
   for the provisioning of Softwire46 Customer Edge (CE) devices.
   Softwire46 is a collective term used to refer to architectures based
   on the notion of IPv4 Address+Port (A+P) for providing IPv4
   connectivity across an IPv6 network.

The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp/

There's also a htmlized version available at:
http://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp-11

A diff from the previous version is available at:
http://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-softwire-map-dhcp-11

Please note that it may take a couple of minutes from the time of submission
until the htmlized version and diff are available at tools.ietf.org.

Internet-Drafts are also available by anonymous FTP at:
ftp://ftp.ietf.org/internet-drafts/

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