Re: [Stox] Gen-ART review for draft-ietf-stox-core-07

Peter Saint-Andre <stpeter@stpeter.im> Mon, 09 December 2013 17:26 UTC

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Date: Mon, 09 Dec 2013 10:26:18 -0700
From: Peter Saint-Andre <stpeter@stpeter.im>
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Cc: "draft-ietf-stox-core.all@tools.ietf.org" <draft-ietf-stox-core.all@tools.ietf.org>, "stox@ietf.org" <stox@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Stox] Gen-ART review for draft-ietf-stox-core-07
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On 12/9/13 10:11 AM, Romascanu, Dan (Dan) wrote:
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. 

Hi Dan, thanks for the review!

> For background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
> 
> <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-stox-core-07
> Reviewer: Dan Romascanu
> Review Date: 12/9/13
> IETF LC End Date: 12/11/13
> IESG Telechat date: 
> 
> Summary:
> Ready
> 
> Major issues:
> None
> 
> Minor issues:
> None
> 
> Nits/editorial comments:
> 
> 1. Please expand XSF at first occurrence

Ack.

> 2. It would be good to find some other wording for 'This document inaugurates a series of SIP-XMPP interworking specifications'. For example 'This document provides information for a series of SIP-XMPP interworking specifications'

How about s/inaugurates/provides the basis for/ ?

Peter

-- 
Peter Saint-Andre
https://stpeter.im/