[Supa] FW: [supa]review of draft-cheng-supa-applicability-01

["King, Daniel" <[e-mail]>]

Hi supa’s,

Please find attached a review of draft-cheng-supa-applicability (version 01) from Tony - Thank you so much!).

Alas, Tony’s initially email bounced hence my forwarding his review to the list. This is not the first time some supa participants have been unable to post to the list but we were unable to find anything wrong with the mailer previously. Either way, we will look again at the issue.

Thanks, Dan.

发件人： [e-mail]<mailto:[e-mail]>
发送时间： 2017-05-27 17:28
收件人： [e-mail]<mailto:[e-mail]>
主题： [supa]review of draft-cheng-supa-applicability-01
Hi all,

I was invited to review this draft. I think the authors have picked three most typical use cases which are meaningful for the people who would implement SUPA.

Here are my comments:

*Technical:
1.       I wonder the meaning of section 3, the part copied from framework draft, may not be needed.
2.       I suggest to replace the title of 4.2.2.and 4.2.3 with detailed information instead of writing just   Example 1 / 2.
3.       The writer wrote “We will define "edgeInterface" role and "EnterpriseDomain" later in  this note” but I failed to find the explanation for these two term.

*Editoral:

1.       Page 5
a model of policy rules, derived from EPRIM, that consist of an event clause, c condition clause, and an action clause.

change to:

a model of policy rules derived from EPRIM. Each policy rule consists of an event clause, a condition clause and an action clause.


2.       Page 5
which is out the scope of SUPA

change to:

which is out of the scope of SUPA


3.       Page 5
SUPA also make use of information collected from network elements

Change to

SUPA also makes use of information collected from network elements


4.       Page 6 Figure 2
SUPA Data Model A

Change to

SUPA Data Model 1


5.       Page 6
The internal details of the network manager / controller may be out of the scope of SUPA, but explaining how it works may help people to understand and implement SUPA

              Change to

The internal details of the networks manager / controller and how it works is presented to help people better understand and implement SUPA, though it may be out of the scope of SUPA.



6.       Page 7
SUPA will reference it rather than trying to define it again.

Change to

SUPA will reference it rather than try to define it again.

7.       Page 7
or the controller may use more complicated algorithms to find out if a router is an edge route, which is implementation specific.

Change to

or the controller may use more complicated algorithms to find out if a router is an edge router, which is implementation specific.


8.       Page 7
such as protocol specific information, traffic with TCP destination port 22 is SNMP traffic

Change to

a.       such as protocol specific information, traffic with TCP destination port 22 being SNMP traffic.
b.      such as protocol specific information that traffic with TCP destination port 22 is SNMP traffic.


9.       Page 7
The network manager / controller also collect information from the network device

Change to

The network manager / controller also collects information from the network device

10.   Page 8
the network manager / controller should converted this action into configuration “disable traffic on TCP port 22” in the IP stack

Change to

the network manager / controller should convert this action into configuration “disable traffic on TCP port 22” in the IP stack

11.   Page 8
which make it possible to support devices from different vendors
Change to:

which makes it possible to support devices from different vendors

12.   Page 8
ensures that SNMP is blocked on ports at the edge

Change to:

ensure that SNMP is blocked on ports at the edge

13.   Page 10
The first case is the simplest, and likely what most people thought. Conceptually, it could look as follows

Change to:

The first case is the simplest, and like what most people thought. Conceptually, it could be viewed as follows

14.   Page 10
meaning that the Policy Engine will be doing a lot of work when most of the time, no policy action is needed.

Change to:

Meaning that the Policy Engine will keep doing a lot of work when most of the time, no policy action is needed.

15.   Page 11
The last paragraph and the third paragraph (starting with “In addition…” )

Change to

Delete one (exactly same)

16.   Page 11
The manipulation of the virtualized VPC network may also affect the configuration of physical network.

Change to:

The manipulation of the virtual VPC network may also affect the configuration of physical network.

17.   Page 11
The second paragraph (starting with “The manipulation …”) and the fourth paragraph (starting with “In many cases”)

Change to:

The fourth paragraph might be part of the second paragraph. The fourth paragraph seems like the part after “The manipulation … physical network”.
Delete the fourth paragraph.

18.   Page 11
newly deploys two VMS in the VPC which are located in different DCs

Change to

To deploy two new VMS in the VPC which are located in different DCs

19.   Page 11
a tenant wants to deploy multiple VPNs to connect the VPC with its private cloud networks and specify the policies to steer the traffics through different VPNs in different conditions

Change to

a tenant has to specify the policies to steer the traffics through different VPNs in different conditions, if the tenant wants to deploy multiple VPNs to connect the VPCs with its private cloud networks

20.   Page 11
Note that the VPCs that the tenant may be located in different geographic regions and the VPNs to those VPCs may need to ….

Change to:

Note that the tenant may be located in different geographic regions and ….

21.   Page 12
There could be quite a number of tunnels, and the tunnel are dynamic, either for the reason of load balancing purpose or VM migration, or other reasons.

Change to:

There could be quite a number of dynamic tunnels, caused by the purpose of load balancing, VM migration or other reasons.

22.   Page 12
service automation is very necessary

Change to:

and thus, service automation is very necessary

23.   Page 13
When a VPC tenant move from one location to another

Change to:

When a VPC tenant moves from one location to another

24.   Page 14
Perform VM migration when user location changed and the network load between the DCs is low

Change to:

Perform VM migration when user’s location changes and the network load between the DCs is low

25.   Page 14
the network manager / controller will check the user’s IP address against an IP address database

Change to:

the network manager / controller will check the user’s IP address according to an IP address database

26.   Page 14
The network manager / controller also maintain a mapping of DCs and IP address segments

Change to

The network manager / controller also maintains a mapping of DCs and IP address segments

27.   Page 14
a DC should serve users in a near location

Change to:
a DCs should serve users in a nearby location

28.   Page 15
minimize the operation procedures

Change to:

to minimize the operation procedures

29.   Page 16
Event: service management system receive a CE requests for VPN creation (forwarded by PE)

Change to

Event: service management system receives a CE requests for VPN creation (forwarded by PE)

Thanks a lot!

Best wishes
Tony Tian
China Mobile

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