Re: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

["Scharf, Michael" <[e-mail]>]

For what it is worth, -06 with the mentioned changes has been published.

The diff can be found at: https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-06.txt

I hope that this update fixes all issues.

Michael

> -----Original Message-----
> From: tcpm <[e-mail]> On Behalf Of Scharf, Michael
> Sent: Tuesday, January 18, 2022 10:32 PM
> To: [e-mail]
> Cc: [e-mail]
> Subject: Re: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
> 
> Hi Med,
> 
> Thanks a lot for this further review with good catches.
> 
> We have addressed all comments in the current working copy for -06, except
> for the disclaimer text regarding line wrap in B.1. This disclaimer is currently
> automatically introduced by the build tools no matter whether it is needed.
> That detail can be sorted out later by the RFC editor.
> 
> Details can be found at the repository with the working copy:
> https://github.com/mjethanandani/ietf-tcp
> 
> Our suggestion is to change the TCP-AO example so that it illustrates the use
> of send-id and recv-id with parameters documented in draft-ietf-tcpm-ao-
> test-vectors.
> 
> As the WGLC is ongoing, we would wait for further comments before
> finalizing -06.
> 
> Thanks
> 
> Michael (as author)
> 
> 
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: [e-mail]
> > <[e-mail]>
> > Sent: Monday, January 3, 2022 10:13 AM
> > To: Scharf, Michael <[e-mail]>
> > Cc: [e-mail]
> > Subject: RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
> >
> > Hi Michael,
> >
> > The changes look good. Thank you.
> >
> > Please find below some comments on the new version:
> > - Section 4
> >
> > (1)
> > OLD:
> >        reference
> >          "RFC XXXX, YANG Model for Transmission Control Protocol (TCP)
> >                     Configuration.";
> >
> > NEW:
> >        reference
> >          "RFC XXXX: A YANG Model for Transmission Control Protocol (TCP)
> >                     Configuration";
> >
> > (2)
> >
> > Add "when set to true" in the description of almost all the Boolean nodes.
> >
> > (3)
> >
> > I still don't think "forms the connection identifier" is accurate. The
> connection
> > is identified by the 4-uple (which is captured in the key statement). You
> may
> > consider simply: s/forms the connection identifier/of the connection.
> > Another better approach would be, e.g.:
> >
> > OLD:
> >  "Local address that forms the connection identifier.";
> > NEW:
> >  "Identifies the address that is used locally by an endpoint to bind the
> > connection.";
> >
> > OLD:
> >  "Remote address that forms the connection identifier.";
> > NEW:
> >  "Identifies the address that is used by the peer endpoint to bind the
> > connection.";
> >
> > etc.
> >
> > - Make this change in 5.2: s/registrations are requested/registration is
> > requested
> > - Update 5.2 to make it explicit that the module is not maintained by IANA:
> >
> > OLD:
> >       name:         ietf-tcp
> >       namespace:    urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:yang:ietf-tcp
> >       prefix:       tcp
> >       reference:    RFC XXXX
> >
> > NEW:
> >       name:         ietf-tcp
> >       namespace:    urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:yang:ietf-tcp
> >       prefix:       tcp
> >       maintained by IANA: N
> >       reference:    RFC XXXX
> >
> > - I think you can remove the note in B.1
> > - remove "\" right after "</description>" in B.2
> > - As you are referring to RFC 8792, you need to add the 8792 header to
> > adhere with the following (B.2):
> >
> > ======
> > ...
> >    Text content that has been folded as specified by this strategy MUST
> >    adhere to the following structure.
> >
> > 7.1.1.  Header
> >
> >    The header is two lines long.
> >
> >    The first line is the following 36-character string; this string MAY
> >    be surrounded by any number of printable characters.  This first line
> >    cannot itself be folded.
> >
> >    NOTE: '\' line wrapping per RFC 8792
> >
> >    The second line is an empty line, containing only the end-of-line
> >    character sequence.  This line provides visual separation for
> >    readability.
> > =====
> >
> > - B.2:
> >
> > <!--
> > This example sets TCP-AO configuration parameters as
> > demonstrated by examples in draft-touch-tcpm-ao-test-vectors.
> > -->
> >
> > Not sure why this I-D is cited here given the example does not echo an
> > example from that I-D (e.g., same local/remote port, local address, etc.).
> > Also, I was expecting to see an example that illustrates the use of send-id
> > and recv-id.
> >
> > If the citation is maintained, please make this change:
> >
> > s/demonstrated by examples in draft-touch-tcpm-ao-test-
> > vectors/demonstrated by examples in I-D.ietf-tcpm-ao-test-vectors
> >
> > Cheers,
> > Med
> >
> > > -----Message d'origine-----
> > > De : Scharf, Michael <[e-mail]>
> > > Envoyé : jeudi 30 décembre 2021 15:19
> > > À : BOUCADAIR Mohamed INNOV/NET
> > <[e-mail]>
> > > Cc : [e-mail]
> > > Objet : RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
> > >
> > > Hi Med,
> > >
> > > Thanks a lot for the detailed review. I went through all your comments.
> > > Most were straightforward to address.
> > >
> > > Our suggestion is to clearly state that MPTCP is outside the scope of this
> > > model. MPTCP may need a different YANG model. Yet, the most obvious
> > use
> > > case of the YANG model are TCP-based control plane protocols on
> routers
> > > (BGP, LDP, ...). At least I am not aware of widespread use of BGP over
> > > MPTCP.
> > >
> > > Can you please have a look at -05 and let me know if -05 works for you?
> > >
> > > The full diff is available at: https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-
> > > ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-05
> > >
> > > Thanks
> > >
> > > Michael
> > >
> > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > From: [e-mail]
> > > > <[e-mail]>
> > > > Sent: Friday, November 12, 2021 11:17 AM
> > > > To: Scharf, Michael <[e-mail]>
> > > > Cc: [e-mail]
> > > > Subject: RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
> > > >
> > > > Hi Michael,
> > > >
> > > > FWIW, please find below some comments to the latest version of the
> > > draft:
> > > >
> > > > * pdf: https://raw.githubusercontent.com/boucadair/IETF-Drafts-
> > > > Reviews/master/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04-rev%20Med.pdf
> > > > * doc: https://github.com/boucadair/IETF-Drafts-
> > > > Reviews/raw/master/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04-rev%20Med.doc
> > > >
> > > > I think that the document is almost stable. Thank you.
> > > >
> > > > Cheers,
> > > > Med
> > > >
> > > > > -----Message d'origine-----
> > > > > De : tcpm <[e-mail]> De la part de
> > > > > [e-mail] Envoyé : lundi 25 octobre 2021 20:22 À :
> > > > > [e-mail] Cc : [e-mail] Objet : [tcpm] I-D Action:
> > > > > draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > A New Internet-Draft is available from the on-line Internet-Drafts
> > > > > directories.
> > > > > This draft is a work item of the TCP Maintenance and Minor
> > > > > Extensions WG of the IETF.
> > > > >
> > > > >         Title           : YANG Model for Transmission Control Protocol
> > > > > (TCP) Configuration
> > > > >         Authors         : Michael Scharf
> > > > >                           Mahesh Jethanandani
> > > > >                           Vishal Murgai
> > > > > 	Filename        : draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
> > > > > 	Pages           : 23
> > > > > 	Date            : 2021-10-25
> > > > >
> > > > > Abstract:
> > > > >    This document specifies a minimal YANG model for TCP on devices
> > > that
> > > > >    are configured by network management protocols.  The YANG
> model
> > > > >    defines a container for all TCP connections and groupings of
> > > > >    authentication parameters that can be imported and used in TCP
> > > > >    implementations or by other models that need to configure TCP
> > > > >    parameters.  The model also includes basic TCP statistics.  The
> > > model
> > > > >    is NMDA (RFC 8342) compliant.
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
> > > > > https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp/
> > > > >
> > > > > There is also an htmlized version available at:
> > > > > https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04
> > > > >
> > > > > A diff from the previous version is available at:
> > > > > https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > Internet-Drafts are also available by anonymous FTP at:
> > > > > ftp://ftp.ietf.org/internet-drafts/
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > _______________________________________________
> > > > > tcpm mailing list
> > > > > [e-mail]
> > > > > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/tcpm
> > > >
> > > >
> >
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> >
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> > Ce message et ses pieces jointes peuvent contenir des informations
> > confidentielles ou privilegiees et ne doivent donc
> > pas etre diffuses, exploites ou copies sans autorisation. Si vous avez recu ce
> > message par erreur, veuillez le signaler
> > a l'expediteur et le detruire ainsi que les pieces jointes. Les messages
> > electroniques etant susceptibles d'alteration,
> > Orange decline toute responsabilite si ce message a ete altere, deforme ou
> > falsifie. Merci.
> >
> > This message and its attachments may contain confidential or privileged
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