Re: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

"Scharf, Michael" <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de> Wed, 09 February 2022 10:42 UTC

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From: "Scharf, Michael" <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de>
To: "touch@strayalpha.com" <touch@strayalpha.com>, "mohamed.boucadair@orange.com" <mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>
CC: "tcpm@ietf.org" <tcpm@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
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Date: Wed, 9 Feb 2022 10:42:26 +0000
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Subject: Re: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
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Hi all,

My proposal would be to await the IESG evaluation of draft-ietf-tcpm-ao-test-vectors. This detail is mentioned in my shepherd write-up as a heads-up.

If the addresses in draft-ietf-tcpm-ao-test-vectors have to be modified, the example in draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp will change as well.

Best regards

Michael


From: touch@strayalpha.com <touch@strayalpha.com>
Sent: Tuesday, February 8, 2022 4:17 PM
To: mohamed.boucadair@orange.com
Cc: Scharf, Michael <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de>; tcpm@ietf.org
Subject: Re: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

Hi, Med,

I disagree. The addresses in test vectors are not examples for documentation, but rather an actual configuration intended for testing purposes.

I found only one other RFC that provides test vectors based on packet fields that include IP addresses: RFC 5769, but it (IMO) incorrectly uses the documentation addresses you suggest (I expect to submit an errata on that shortly - let me know if you know of others).

Joe

—
Joe Touch, temporal epistemologist
www.strayalpha.com<http://www.strayalpha.com>


On Feb 8, 2022, at 12:39 AM, mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com> wrote:

Hi Michael,

Thank you.

There is one minor comment about the ipv6 addresses in the examples: they should be derived from the prefix in RFC 3849. This should be fixed in draft-ietf-tcpm-ao-test-vectors (the same applies for 10.11.12.13, etcs that are not from the blocks defined in 5737).

Other than that, this looks good to me. Thanks.

Cheers,
Med


-----Message d'origine-----
De : Scharf, Michael <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de<mailto:Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de>>
Envoyé : vendredi 4 février 2022 22:12
À : BOUCADAIR Mohamed INNOV/NET <mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>>
Cc : tcpm@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm@ietf.org>
Objet : RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

For what it is worth, -06 with the mentioned changes has been published.

The diff can be found at: https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-
tcpm-yang-tcp-06.txt

I hope that this update fixes all issues.

Michael


-----Original Message-----
From: tcpm <tcpm-bounces@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm-bounces@ietf.org>> On Behalf Of Scharf, Michael
Sent: Tuesday, January 18, 2022 10:32 PM
To: mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>
Cc: tcpm@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

Hi Med,

Thanks a lot for this further review with good catches.

We have addressed all comments in the current working copy for -06,
except for the disclaimer text regarding line wrap in B.1. This
disclaimer is currently automatically introduced by the build tools no
matter whether it is needed.

That detail can be sorted out later by the RFC editor.

Details can be found at the repository with the working copy:
https://github.com/mjethanandani/ietf-tcp

Our suggestion is to change the TCP-AO example so that it illustrates
the use of send-id and recv-id with parameters documented in
draft-ietf-tcpm-ao- test-vectors.

As the WGLC is ongoing, we would wait for further comments before
finalizing -06.

Thanks

Michael (as author)



-----Original Message-----
From: mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>
<mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>>
Sent: Monday, January 3, 2022 10:13 AM
To: Scharf, Michael <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de<mailto:Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de>>
Cc: tcpm@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm@ietf.org>
Subject: RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

Hi Michael,

The changes look good. Thank you.

Please find below some comments on the new version:
- Section 4

(1)
OLD:
      reference
        "RFC XXXX, YANG Model for Transmission Control Protocol
(TCP)

                   Configuration.";

NEW:
      reference
        "RFC XXXX: A YANG Model for Transmission Control Protocol
(TCP)

                   Configuration";

(2)

Add "when set to true" in the description of almost all the Boolean
nodes.


(3)

I still don't think "forms the connection identifier" is accurate.
The
connection

is identified by the 4-uple (which is captured in the key
statement). You
may

consider simply: s/forms the connection identifier/of the
connection.

Another better approach would be, e.g.:

OLD:
"Local address that forms the connection identifier.";
NEW:
"Identifies the address that is used locally by an endpoint to bind
the connection.";

OLD:
"Remote address that forms the connection identifier.";
NEW:
"Identifies the address that is used by the peer endpoint to bind
the connection.";

etc.

- Make this change in 5.2: s/registrations are
requested/registration is requested
- Update 5.2 to make it explicit that the module is not maintained
by IANA:


OLD:
     name:         ietf-tcp
     namespace:    urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:yang:ietf-tcp
     prefix:       tcp
     reference:    RFC XXXX

NEW:
     name:         ietf-tcp
     namespace:    urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:yang:ietf-tcp
     prefix:       tcp
     maintained by IANA: N
     reference:    RFC XXXX

- I think you can remove the note in B.1
- remove "\" right after "</description>" in B.2
- As you are referring to RFC 8792, you need to add the 8792 header
to adhere with the following (B.2):

======
...
  Text content that has been folded as specified by this strategy
MUST

  adhere to the following structure.

7.1.1.  Header

  The header is two lines long.

  The first line is the following 36-character string; this string
MAY

  be surrounded by any number of printable characters.  This first
line

  cannot itself be folded.

  NOTE: '\' line wrapping per RFC 8792

  The second line is an empty line, containing only the end-of-line
  character sequence.  This line provides visual separation for
  readability.
=====

- B.2:

<!--
This example sets TCP-AO configuration parameters as demonstrated by
examples in draft-touch-tcpm-ao-test-vectors.
-->

Not sure why this I-D is cited here given the example does not echo
an example from that I-D (e.g., same local/remote port, local
address, etc.).

Also, I was expecting to see an example that illustrates the use of
send-id and recv-id.

If the citation is maintained, please make this change:

s/demonstrated by examples in draft-touch-tcpm-ao-test-
vectors/demonstrated by examples in I-D.ietf-tcpm-ao-test-vectors

Cheers,
Med


-----Message d'origine-----
De : Scharf, Michael <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de<mailto:Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de>> Envoyé :
jeudi 30 décembre 2021 15:19 À : BOUCADAIR Mohamed INNOV/NET
<mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>>

Cc : tcpm@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm@ietf.org>
Objet : RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

Hi Med,

Thanks a lot for the detailed review. I went through all your
comments.

Most were straightforward to address.

Our suggestion is to clearly state that MPTCP is outside the scope
of this model. MPTCP may need a different YANG model. Yet, the
most obvious
use

case of the YANG model are TCP-based control plane protocols on
routers

(BGP, LDP, ...). At least I am not aware of widespread use of BGP
over MPTCP.

Can you please have a look at -05 and let me know if -05 works for
you?


The full diff is available at:
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-
ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-05

Thanks

Michael


-----Original Message-----
From: mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>
<mohamed.boucadair@orange.com<mailto:mohamed.boucadair@orange.com>>
Sent: Friday, November 12, 2021 11:17 AM
To: Scharf, Michael <Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de<mailto:Michael.Scharf@hs-esslingen.de>>
Cc: tcpm@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm@ietf.org>
Subject: RE: [tcpm] I-D Action: draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt

Hi Michael,

FWIW, please find below some comments to the latest version of
the
draft:


* pdf: https://raw.githubusercontent.com/boucadair/IETF-Drafts-
Reviews/master/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04-rev%20Med.pdf
* doc: https://github.com/boucadair/IETF-Drafts-
Reviews/raw/master/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04-rev%20Med.doc

I think that the document is almost stable. Thank you.

Cheers,
Med


-----Message d'origine-----
De : tcpm <tcpm-bounces@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm-bounces@ietf.org>> De la part de
internet-drafts@ietf.org<mailto:internet-drafts@ietf.org> Envoyé : lundi 25 octobre 2021 20:22
À :

i-d-announce@ietf.org<mailto:i-d-announce@ietf.org> Cc : tcpm@ietf.org<mailto:tcpm@ietf.org> Objet : [tcpm] I-D
Action:

draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt


A New Internet-Draft is available from the on-line
Internet-Drafts directories.
This draft is a work item of the TCP Maintenance and Minor
Extensions WG of the IETF.

       Title           : YANG Model for Transmission Control
Protocol

(TCP) Configuration
       Authors         : Michael Scharf
                         Mahesh Jethanandani
                         Vishal Murgai
Filename        : draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04.txt
Pages           : 23
Date            : 2021-10-25

Abstract:
  This document specifies a minimal YANG model for TCP on
devices
that

  are configured by network management protocols.  The YANG
model

  defines a container for all TCP connections and groupings
of

  authentication parameters that can be imported and used in
TCP

  implementations or by other models that need to configure
TCP

  parameters.  The model also includes basic TCP statistics.
The
model

  is NMDA (RFC 8342) compliant.


The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp/

There is also an htmlized version available at:
https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp
-04

A diff from the previous version is available at:
https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-tcpm-yang-tcp-04


Internet-Drafts are also available by anonymous FTP at:
ftp://ftp.ietf.org/internet-drafts/


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Orange decline toute responsabilite si ce message a ete altere, deforme ou falsifie. Merci.

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they should not be distributed, used or copied without authorisation.
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Thank you.

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