Re: [Teas] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc-05
"Rakesh Gandhi (rgandhi)" <rgandhi@cisco.com> Thu, 08 December 2016 14:50 UTC
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From: "Rakesh Gandhi (rgandhi)" <rgandhi@cisco.com>
To: Christian Hopps <chopps@chopps.org>, "rtg-ads@ietf.org" <rtg-ads@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: RtgDir review: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc-05
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Date: Thu, 8 Dec 2016 14:50:22 +0000
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Subject: Re: [Teas] RtgDir review:
draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc-05
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Hi Christian, Thank you for the thorough review of the document. We have posted following revision that addresses your comments: The IETF datatracker status page for this draft is: https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc/ There's also a htmlized version available at: https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc-06 A diff from the previous version is available at: https://www.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url2=draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc-06 Thanks, Rakesh (for authors and contributors) On 2016-12-07, 7:44 AM, "Christian Hopps" <chopps@chopps.org> wrote: >Hello, > >I have been selected as the Routing Directorate reviewer for this draft. The >Routing Directorate seeks to review all routing or routing-related drafts as >they pass through IETF last call and IESG review, and sometimes on special >request. The purpose of the review is to provide assistance to the Routing ADs. >For more information about the Routing Directorate, please see >http://trac.tools.ietf.org/area/rtg/trac/wiki/RtgDir > >Although these comments are primarily for the use of the Routing ADs, it would >be helpful if you could consider them along with any other IETF Last Call >comments that you receive, and strive to resolve them through discussion or by >updating the draft. > >Document: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resource-sharing-proc-05 >Reviewer: Christian Hopps >Review Date: 2016-12-06 >IETF LC End Date: Unknown >Intended Status: Informational > >Summary: >======== > > This document is basically ready for publication. It has 1 minor > issue and some nits that should be considered prior to publication. > >Comments: >========= > > I found the draft fairly well written, easy to understand with good > references. I believe that after fixing the minor issue and nits, > this informational draft will be ready for publication. This was the > first TEAS draft I have reviewed, and as a result it may mean that > my review is less in depth than others. > >Major Issues: >============= > > No major issues found. > > >Minor Issues: >============= > > 1. 3rd paragraph: First sentence doesn't parse for me, i.e., I can't figure > out what this means: > > "In GMPLS end-to-end recovery schemes generally considered, > restoration..." > > Is it trying to say: > > "When considering GMPLS end-to-end recovery schemes, the > restoration..."? > > or > > "Generally GMPLS end-to-end recovery schemes have the restoration..." > > or > > ...? > >Nits: >===== > > Most of these are due to missing articles (i.e., the/a/an). I may > have missed some. > > 1. 2nd paragraph: > Change: "ASSOCIATION object" to "an ASSOCIATION object" > > 1. 4th paragraph: > Add a comma after "teardown" > Change: "including following" to "including the following" > > 1. 6th paragraph: > Change: "ASSOCIATION object with" to "an ASSOCIATION object with" > Change: "Procedure" to "The procedure" > Change: "ASSOCIATION object is" to "an ASSOCIATION object is" > > 2.1. 1st paragrah: > Change: ", working LSP" to: ", a working LSP" > Change: > "Unlike protection LSP, restoration LSP is signaled per need basis." > to: > "Unlike a protection LSP, a restoration LSP is signaled on a per > need basis." > > 2.1. 2nd paragraph: > Change: "Typically when failure is recovered" > to: "Typically when the failure has recovered" > Change: "restoration LSP" to: "the restoration LSP" > Change: "and torn down, while" to: "and is torn down while" > > 2.2. 2nd paragraph: > Change ", working LSP on" to: ", a working LSP on" > Change "and protecting LSP on" to: "and a protecting LSP on" > Change: > "Nonetheless, restoration LSP with working LSP it is restoring as > well as restoration LSP with protecting LSP it is restoring can > share network resources. > to: > "Nonetheless, a restoration LSP with the working LSP it is restoring > as well as a restoration LSP with the protecting LSP it is restoring > can share network resources. > > 2.2. 3nd paragraph: > Change: "restoration LSP" to "a restoration LSP" > > 2.2. 4th paragraph: > Change: "either working" to: "either a working" > > 2.2. 5th paragraph: > Change: "either working" to: "either a working" > > 3.2. 4th paragraph: > Change: ", node may" to: ", a node may" > > 3.2. 5th paragraph: > Change: "reroute procedure" to: "the reroute procedure" > Change: "rerouting process" to: "the rerouting process" > > 3.2. Table 1, Category C1, 2nd paragraph: > 3.2. Table 1, Category C2, 2nd paragraph: > 3.2. Table 1, Category C3, 2nd paragraph: > In each change "This type of nodes needs" to: > "This type of node needs". > or > "These types of nodes need". > > 3.3. 2nd paragraph: > Change "with working" to "with a working" > > 3.3. 3rd paragraph: > Change "with working" to "with a working" > > 3.3.1. 2nd paragraph: > Change "has few" to "has a few". > > 3.3.1. 3rd from last paragraph: > Change "in corner cases completion guarantee" to > "in corner cases a completion guarantee" > > 3.3.2. 1st paragraph: > Change "head-end chooses" to "the head-end chooses"
- [Teas] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-resou… Christian Hopps
- Re: [Teas] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-r… Rakesh Gandhi (rgandhi)
- Re: [Teas] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-r… Rakesh Gandhi (rgandhi)