[Teep] Comments on draft-ietf-teep-usecase-for-cc-in-network-02

[Mingliang Pei <[e-mail]>]

Hi Penglin and co-authors,

Here are a few quick comments on the current draft:

Section 1:
>> ... Environment"[CCC-White-Paper
<https://www.ietf.org/archive/id/draft-ietf-teep-usecase-for-cc-in-network-02.html#CCC-White-Paper>
].
Nits: Extra "

>> In detail, computing unit with confidential computing feature could
generate an isolated hardware-protected area,
Is "hardware-protected area" a common way to say it? Do you need to refer
more such as "in a TEE" or "Security Domain" as examples?

>> ... users need to attest and deploy their data and applications in the
TEE environment
In this sentence immediately following the above, it gives almost only
choice, being "TEE". Is non-TEE technology an option in the CCC referred
general "protected area" or your use of this terminology?

>> In confidential computing, the TEE can also be provisioned and managed
by TEEP architectue and protocol.
1) it is TAs that can be provisioned, not TEE
2) Nits: the TEE --> a TEE
3) Nits: typo architecture

Section 3:

>> Title: Notational Architecture of using confidential ...
Do you want to capitalize all words or not capitalize "Architecture"?

>> Figure 1: notational architecture
Suggest to capitalize the first word at least

Section 4:

>> Usecases
I believe it is more common to use "Use Cases"

>> UA, TA and PD
"PD" isn't defined in TEEP and anywhere in this doc. I understand it tries
to mean "Personalization Data".

>> Case 5 and 6 are new cases that possible in implementation.
TEEP Architecture doc section 4.4 has 5 cases. Need to remove the reference
with case 6.
Also suggest adding TEEP Arch draft reference link here
Nits: ... that are possible....

Section 4.1

>> 4.1 This use case refers to the case 1 of TEEP architecture.
Clarify or make it explicit what "case 1" means - which section in TEEP
Architecture doc. There are the Use Cases section 3 in that doc where it
lists only three cases.

>> The TAM works as Verifier
Nits: as a Verifier

>> Network User works as Relying Party
"Relying Party" may need a definition when it is capitalized. It is first
time used here in the doc.
Nits: a Relying Party

>> The arrow means deploy package to
Nits: means to deploy ...

>> {att TEEP Agent
What does "att" mean?

Isn't a TEEP Broker needed? It is central to the TEEP Architecture. The
sequence row in Figure 2 doesn't mention it.

Similar comments about TEEP Broker for other sections 4.2 - 4.5.

Best,

Ming

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