Re: [TLS] Updated draft: Minor Edits
<peter.robinson@rsa.com> Mon, 04 January 2010 06:14 UTC
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Thread-Topic: [TLS] Updated draft: Minor Edits
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From: peter.robinson@rsa.com
To: ekr@networkresonance.com, tls@ietf.org
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Subject: Re: [TLS] Updated draft: Minor Edits
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Hi Eric, Here are some minor changes that David Makepeace and I recommend to draft-ietf-tls-renegotiation-02.txt: Section 1.0, last paragraph, eighth line: "date" should be "data" Section 1.0, last paragraph, last line: Inverted commas (") at the end of the paragraph should be removed. Section 4.0, first paragraph, fifth line: This currently reads "..."renegotiation info" may find handshake failures". I think the word "extension" should be added to "renegotiation info" to match the usage elsewhere in the draft. I think that "find" should be changed to "encountered". Hence, the revised version would read: ..."renegotiation info" extension may encounter handshake failures. Section 4.0, first paragraph, eighth line: I would capitalize the first letter of the words which make up the acronym SCSV so there is absolutely no confusion over what the acronym stands for. Section 4.0, first paragraph, eleventh line: I think the word "exactly" can be removed - having it here implies that elsewhere when one reads "has the same" means that in some way things are not really the same, and are just similar. Section 6.1, second paragraph, ninth line: This currently reads "...no set of client behavior which..." I think this should be "...no set client behavior which..." (removing "of" and implying one behavior), but perhaps it should be "...no set of client behaviors which..." (adding an s to behavior implying multiple behaviors). Peter ------------------------------------------------ Peter Robinson - peter.robinson@rsa.com Engineering Manager RSA, The Security Division of EMC - http://www.rsa.com/ Level 32, Waterfront Place, 1 Eagle Street, Brisbane, Queensland 4000, AUSTRALIA. Phone: +61 7 3227 4427, Mobile: +61 407 962 150, Fax: +61 7 3227 4400. -----Original Message----- From: tls-bounces@ietf.org [mailto:tls-bounces@ietf.org] On Behalf Of Eric Rescorla Sent: Thursday, 17 December 2009 7:32 AM To: tls@ietf.org Subject: [TLS] Updated draft I've just submitted a new draft that is intended to enact most of Pasi's message as well as the noncontroversial editorial comments people have raised. Here is what I know still needs work: - The final resolution to what's sent in the legacy renegotiation case (see Pasi's message and the text I sent earlier). - New text for the identity section in Security considerations. (Pending closure on the list). - Make a pass through for clarity for implementors. (Also, I have some text here that Pasi contributed that I need to work in). If you think you made a comment which is noncontroversial that didn't make it in and/or I screwed up incorporating your comment, please let me know and I'll try to fix. For some reason, the submission tool is forcing manual submission. In the interim you can find it at: https://svn.resiprocate.org/rep/ietf-drafts/ekr/draft-ietf-tls-renegotiate.txt Thanks, -Ekr _______________________________________________ TLS mailing list TLS@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/tls
- [TLS] Updated draft Eric Rescorla
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Michael D'Errico
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Robert Dugal
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Marsh Ray
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Robert Dugal
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Eric Rescorla
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Martin Rex
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Marsh Ray
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Martin Rex
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Michael D'Errico
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Stephen Farrell
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Martin Rex
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Martin Rex
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Marsh Ray
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Martin Rex
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Michael D'Errico
- [TLS] SCSV vs RI when both specified. Was: Update… Marsh Ray
- Re: [TLS] SCSV vs RI when both specified. Was: Up… Martin Rex
- [TLS] Apologies Martin Rex
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft - editorial tom.petch
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft tom.petch
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft Marsh Ray
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft tom.petch
- Re: [TLS] Updated draft: Minor Edits peter.robinson