Re: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-ietf-trill-rfc6439bis-02.txt

Donald Eastlake <d3e3e3@gmail.com> Fri, 19 August 2016 05:47 UTC

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From: Donald Eastlake <d3e3e3@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, 19 Aug 2016 01:47:26 -0400
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To: Susan Hares <shares@ndzh.com>
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Cc: Jon Hudson <jon.hudson@gmail.com>, draft-ietf-trill-rfc6439bis@ietf.org, "trill@ietf.org" <trill@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-ietf-trill-rfc6439bis-02.txt
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Version -03 just posted incorporates the editorial changes below.

Thanks,
Donald
===============================
 Donald E. Eastlake 3rd   +1-508-333-2270 (cell)
 155 Beaver Street, Milford, MA 01757 USA
 d3e3e3@gmail.com


On Thu, Aug 11, 2016 at 12:01 AM, Donald Eastlake <d3e3e3@gmail.com> wrote:
> Hi Sue,
>
> On Wed, Aug 10, 2016 at 3:30 PM, Susan Hares <shares@ndzh.com> wrote:
>> Trill WG:
>>
>> I missed one other editorial change for RFC6439bis-02.txt.
>>
>> RFC7180 has been obsoleted by RFC7780.  This needs to be changed.
>
> Well, the only reference to RFC 7180 is in Appendix B where it is, in
> fact, talking about RFC 7180 being obsoleted by RFC 7780. This is why
> RFC 7180 was listed as an Informational reference while the many
> references to RFC 7780 are mostly normative and it is listed as a
> normative reference. I suggest just changing "[RFC7180]" to "RFC 7180"
> in the appendix so hopefully the nits checker won't notice it :-)
>
> See below.
>
>> Sue
>>
>> From: trill [mailto:trill-bounces@ietf.org] On Behalf Of Susan Hares
>> Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2016 3:18 PM
>> To: trill@ietf.org
>> Cc: 'Donald Eastlake'; draft-ietf-trill-rfc6439bis@ietf.org; 'Jon Hudson'
>> Subject: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of
>> draft-ietf-trill-rfc6439bis-02.txt
>>
>> Status: Ready to publish
>> Concerns: None
>>
>> Editorial nits:
>>
>> Section 2.2.1 - paragraph 6 sentence starting with /should the VLANs - it
>> would help if the sentence was broken into to sentences.
>
> I think the best think to do might be to parenthesis the "example" and
> then to indent the remainder of the paragraph after the ":". See
> attached for what the paragraph would then look like.
>
>> Section 4.0 - 4th paragraph - in the 1st numbered sub-paragraph - the
>> sentence starting with /This is backward/
>>
>> Is "backward compatible" correct English.  My understanding is that it would
>> "backwardly compatible" (adverb adjective-noun).
>
> I think "backward compatible" is a common computer term. I suppose it
> is some sort of compound adjective. How about if it is hyphenated?
>
>> This sentence would also benefit from breaking it in 2.
>
> OK.
>
> Thanks,
> Donald
> ===============================
>  Donald E. Eastlake 3rd   +1-508-333-2270 (cell)
>  155 Beaver Street, Milford, MA 01757 USA
>  d3e3e3@gmail.com
>
>> Sue Hares

Re: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-iet… Susan Hares
Re: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-iet… Donald Eastlake
Re: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-iet… Donald Eastlake
Re: [trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-iet… Susan Hares
[trill] Shepherd's review Review of draft-ietf-tr… Susan Hares