[trill] corrections on draft-ietf-trill-p2mp-bfd-00

gayle noble <windy_1@skyhighway.com> Sat, 12 September 2015 14:57 UTC

Return-Path: <windy_1@skyhighway.com>
X-Original-To: trill@ietfa.amsl.com
Delivered-To: trill@ietfa.amsl.com
Received: from localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 573E71B3A8D for <trill@ietfa.amsl.com>; Sat, 12 Sep 2015 07:57:33 -0700 (PDT)
X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com
X-Spam-Flag: NO
X-Spam-Score: 0.791
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=0.791 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_50=0.8, HTML_MESSAGE=0.001, T_RP_MATCHES_RCVD=-0.01] autolearn=ham
Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id v4qaVoZt_IuK for <trill@ietfa.amsl.com>; Sat, 12 Sep 2015 07:57:31 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from skyhighway.com (skyhighway.com [63.249.82.6]) (using TLSv1 with cipher DHE-RSA-AES256-SHA (256/256 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id B80431B3737 for <trill@ietf.org>; Sat, 12 Sep 2015 07:57:31 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from Firefly.skyhighway.com (dsl-63-249-88-160.static.cruzio.com [63.249.88.160]) by skyhighway.com with ESMTP id t8CEvOFQ024944 for <trill@ietf.org>; Sat, 12 Sep 2015 07:57:24 -0700 (PDT)
Message-Id: <201509121457.t8CEvOFQ024944@skyhighway.com>
X-Mailer: QUALCOMM Windows Eudora Version 7.1.0.9
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 2015 07:57:30 -0700
To: trill@ietf.org
From: gayle noble <windy_1@skyhighway.com>
In-Reply-To: <CAF4+nEGrEMC-Zio+T6xyQxg1QmKnMzYR=HieuO4zKntY71YR3w@mail.g mail.com>
References: <20150912050428.3487.28490.idtracker@ietfa.amsl.com> <CAF4+nEGrEMC-Zio+T6xyQxg1QmKnMzYR=HieuO4zKntY71YR3w@mail.gmail.com>
Mime-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="=====================_227595552==.ALT"
Archived-At: <http://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/trill/MJb56aNwfIqEEXTbWM15_RLhpwg>
Subject: [trill] corrections on draft-ietf-trill-p2mp-bfd-00
X-BeenThere: trill@ietf.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.15
Precedence: list
List-Id: "Developing a hybrid router/bridge." <trill.ietf.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/options/trill>, <mailto:trill-request@ietf.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/browse/trill/>
List-Post: <mailto:trill@ietf.org>
List-Help: <mailto:trill-request@ietf.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/trill>, <mailto:trill-request@ietf.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Sat, 12 Sep 2015 14:57:33 -0000

In draft-ietf-trill-p2mp-bfd-00 I found four things that I'd like re-worded :)

1.     page 2 Introduction third paragraph second and third sentence
[The first sentence states the tail LOST connectivity from the head. 
This translates to meaning there is no way for the tail to talk to 
the head. Then the next sentence states it must inform this head that 
it cannot talk to (based on the first sentence) it using the existing 
RBridge Channel. I think the first sentence needs to be re-worded for 
clarity as I am now assuming the first sentence really is trying to 
say that the tail lost connectivity on the new RBridge Channel that 
was allocated for this purpose. Also - the word "when" implies this 
will happen more often then not. I'd use the word "If" to imply this 
is a rare occurrence. But that's me]
(as written)
When the tail loses connectivity from the head, the tail should 
notify the head of the lack of multipoint connectivity with unicast 
BFD Control packets.
These packets are transmitted using the existing RBridge Channel 
assigned to BFD Control [RFC7175].
(I'd write)
If the tail loses connectivity from the head on the new RBridge 
Channel protocol, the tail should notify the head of the lack of 
multipoint connectivity with unicast BFD Control packets. These 
packets are transmitted using the existing RBridge Channel assigned 
to BFD Control [RFC7175].

2.   page 3 #4 A New RBridge Channel for P2MP BFD first paragraph 
third sentence
[Sentence reads weird - normally if "while for" is used there would 
be something before that was different in the same sentence]
(as written)
While for P2MP BFD, the head is required to probe tails using multicast.
(I'd write)
In P2MP BFD, the head is required to probe tails using multicast.

3.   page four first paragraph
[In case someone is skimming the document I'd make it a bit clearer 
which channel is being referenced in this sentence]
(as written)
As specified in [RFC7178], when the tail receives TRILL Data packets 
sent on the channel, it will absorb the packets itself rather than 
deliver these packets to its attached end-stations.
(I'd write)
As specified in [RFC7178], when the tail receives TRILL Data packets 
sent on this newly specified channel, it will absorb the packets 
itself rather than deliver these packets to its attached end-stations.

4.   page four Discriminators and Packet Demultiplexing second 
paragraph last sentence
[ "need" should be "needs" as tail is singular]
(as written)
If the tail need to notify the head about the failure of a multipath, 
the tail is required to send unicast BFD Control packets using the 
same Data Label as used by the head.
(as written)
If the tail needs to notify the head about the failure of a 
multipath, the tail is required to send unicast BFD Control packets 
using the same Data Label as used by the head.


thanks!
gayle