[Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-emu-tls-eap-types-10

Thomas Fossati via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> Tue, 24 January 2023 18:35 UTC

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Subject: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-emu-tls-eap-types-10
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Reviewer: Thomas Fossati
Review result: Ready

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-emu-tls-eap-types-??
Reviewer: Thomas Fossati
Review Date: 2023-01-24
IETF LC End Date: 2023-01-27
IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat

Summary:

The document adapts some existing EAP methods (EAP-FAST, EAP-TTLS, TEAP
and PEAP) to be used with TLS 1.3.  In particular: 
- it defines the new key derivations,
- clarifies the use of client certs,
- describes the rules around processing of application data,
  NewSessionTicket and resumption

The draft is very clearly written and organised.

The IANA section contains clear, unambiguous instructions.

>From a gen-art perspective it looks ready to me.

Major issues: none

Minor issues: none

Nits/editorial comments:

OLD
   There remain some differences between EAP-TLS and other TLS-based EAP
   methods which necessitates this document.
NEW
   There remain some differences between EAP-TLS and other TLS-based EAP
   methods which are addressed by this document.

OLD
   Similarly, when the inner authentication protocol indicates that
   authentication has succeed
NEW
   Similarly, when the inner authentication protocol indicates that
   authentication has succeeded

Style (feel free to ignore):
- "all of" => all
- "both of [these]" => "both"
- "whether or not" => "whether"

Typos:
- indicatoin
- deriviation
- identies