[Acme] Re: Genart last call review of draft-ietf-acme-ari-07

[Aaron Gable <[e-mail]>]

Hi Susan,

Thank you for the feedback. I've addressed these changes in the github
working copy in https://github.com/aarongable/draft-acme-ari/pull/89, which
will be included in the next version of the document. Individual comments
inline below.

Thanks again,
Aaron

On Sun, Dec 8, 2024 at 1:06 PM Susan Hares via Datatracker <[e-mail]>
wrote:

> Minor Issues:
> 1) What happens in the case of a large clock skew between the ACME Client
> and servers, and
>

This topic was included in the Security Considerations section as a result
of the DNSDIR review
<https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/review-ietf-acme-ari-06-dnsdir-lc-huston-2024-11-23/>.
I believe I have largely addressed their feedback.


> 2) Use of unauthenticated GET Requests.


This topic was included in the Security Considerations section as a result
of the SECDIR review of draft -06
<https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/review-ietf-acme-ari-06-secdir-lc-emery-2024-11-26/>.
That reviewer has indicated that draft -07 satisfies their concerns
<https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/acme/taSJ9dPguM0lxTe3NeR-Aj9EDSM/>.


> Nits/editorial comments:
> 1. Introduction, Paragraph 1, Use of ";", problem: Unclear sentence.
> reason: Grammar
> Old text:/ They may be configured to renew at
>    a specific interval (e.g., via cron); they may parse the issued
>    certificate to determine its expiration date and renew a specific
>    amount of time before then; or they may parse the issued certificate
>    and renew when some percentage of its validity period has passed./
>
> What's wrong:  The grammar usage for semi-color is that the phrases
> separated by the ";" are equal restatements of the same information.
> A different form of the list would be a clearer statement.


I've switched this sentence to use commas instead of semicolons. I believe
the semicolons were holdovers from a prior version of this sentence that
had more complex (comma-containing) structures within each list item.

2.  Section 6, paragraph 2, 2nd sentence, Unclear sentence
>
> Text:/ For example, a server might place the suggested renewal
>    window wholly in the past to encourage a client to renew immediately;
>    but a client with a sufficiently slow clock might see the suggested
>    window as still being in the future./
>
> Option1:
> New text:/ For example, a server might place the suggested renewal
>    window wholly in the past to encourage a client to renew immediately.
>    However, a client with a sufficiently slow clock might see the suggested
>    window as being in the future./
>

I've taken a slightly different approach to simplifying this sentence:
"For example, if a server places the suggested renewal window wholly in the
past to encourage a client to renew immediately, a client with a
sufficiently slow clock might nonetheless see the window as being in the
future."