[CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-vcat-lcas-11.txt
Adrian Farrel <Adrian.Farrel@huawei.com> Fri, 29 April 2011 18:53 UTC
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Date: Fri, 29 Apr 2011 19:53:33 +0100
From: Adrian Farrel <Adrian.Farrel@huawei.com>
To: draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-vcat-lcas@tools.ietf.org
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Cc: huub.van.helvoort@huawei.com, 'CCAMP' <ccamp@ietf.org>, ccamp-chairs@tools.ietf.org
Subject: [CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-vcat-lcas-11.txt
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Hi, Don't panic! I have performed my AD review of your draft. The purpose of the review is to catch any nits or issues before the document goes forward to IETF last call and IESG review. By getting these issues out at this stage we can hope for a higher quality review and a smoother passage through the process. Thank you for a detailed and well-written draft. I have no technical issues with the content, but a number of small editorial comments and process-related questions below need to be thought about. All of my comments are up for discussion, and you should not feel rail- roaded into making changes. But I do think my comments need to be addressed before the draft moves forward, and I would like to see your answers to my points and/or a revised I-D. I have moved the draft into "AD-review:Revised-ID-needed" state in the datatracker, and I look forward to seeing the new revision which I can put forward for IETF last call. Thanks, Adrian --- The header correctly says "Updates: 4606", but the correct format of this statement is "Updates: 4606 (if approved)" --- Since the document was first submitted before 10 November 2008, can the editor confirm that all authors have waived their pre-RFC5378 rights? --- Abstract To be more clear about the update of 4606 and to remove the citation from the abstract, can we... OLD This document updates the procedures for supporting virtual concatenation in [RFC4606]. NEW This document updates RFC 4606 by making modifications to the procedures for supporting virtual concatenation. END --- In the Table of Contents, and in the section header... c/Author's Addresses/Authors' Addresses/ --- Some acronyms need to be expanded on first use. TDM LSR LSP NVC --- Section 2.2 Should you include a definition of "co-routed". This is not quite as obvious as it might seem since the meanings could be: - same routers in the same order (includes parallel links) - same logical links in the same order (includes bundles) - same data links in the same order (i.e. same physical interfaces) A bit of this comes out through careful reading of the different categories, so maybe it is not needed, but it might help. --- Section 2.2 In "member sharing" are the members required to be co-routed or can they be diversely routed? I think either. Can you add a note? --- Section 2.3 . GMPLS signaling for non-LCAS-capable interfaces MUST support only the "fixed" scenarios of section 2.2. This appears to say: MUST NOT support the "dynamic" scenarios. If you mean that, can you reword accordingly. On the other hand, it is also possible you mean: MUST support the "fixed" scenarios and MAY also support the "dynamic" scenarios. --- Section 4 I agree that it is right to include this section, but I would like you to make it clearer that 4606 is normative. How about... OLD Note that this section is included for informational purposes only. NEW Note that this section is included for informational purposes only and does not modify [RFC4606]. It is provided to show how the existing GMPLS procedures may be used. [RFC4606] provides the normative definition for GMPLS processing of VCGs composed of a single member set, and in the event of any conflict between this section and that document, [RFC4606] takes precedence. END --- Section 4.3 Note if using LCAS, a VCG member can be temporary removed from the VCG due to a failure of the component signal. The LCAS data plane signaling will take appropriate actions to adjust the VCG as described in [ITU-T-G.7042]. s/temporary/temporarily/ --- Figure 1 caption Figure 1 Figure 1. Conceptual containment relationship between VCG, VCAT calls, control plane LSPs, and data plane connections. "Figure 1" appears twice --- Section 5.2 Given that "Number of Members" is a two octet integer, you need to mention the byte order on the wire. --- Section 5.2 I'm a bit surprised that you have used a whole 8 bits for "LCAS Required". Probably not important, but you could carve out some spare bits for future extensions without changing the format. --- Section 5.2 Should you also have a registry for the Elementary Signal Types listed in this section? it seems likely that there will be future additions to the list. You should say that unlisted values are reserved and you should say what the allocation policy is for future values. The same applies to "Action" since future actions might show up. --- Section 6 might need to note error cases for unknown "LCAS Required" setting (perhaps this can be noted as a malformed message and result in a standard result code?) and unknown or unsupported "Action" (I suggest that this is another instance for your list because some of the actions might not be supported by an implementation, and new actions may be defined.) --- Section 7.1 I suggest you remove the suggested value (2) from the document. Suggesting values is pretty risky for implementers and in this case your suggested value clashes with RFC 6004. --- Section 8 I suggest you add one additional paragraph to this section. See [RFC5920] for additional information on GMPLS security. And (obviously) add an Informative Reference to 5920 --- You can probably delete the final line... "Acknowledgment"
- [CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-vcat-… Adrian Farrel
- Re: [CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-v… Greg Bernstein
- Re: [CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-v… Adrian Farrel
- Re: [CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-v… Greg Bernstein
- Re: [CCAMP] AD review of draft-ietf-ccamp-gmpls-v… Adrian Farrel