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Re: [Detnet] [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-detnet-mpls-oam-13

Lars Eggert <lars@eggert.org> Thu, 04 January 2024 11:30 UTC

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From: Lars Eggert <lars@eggert.org>
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Date: Thu, 04 Jan 2024 13:30:25 +0200
Cc: gen-art@ietf.org, detnet@ietf.org, draft-ietf-detnet-mpls-oam.all@ietf.org, last-call@ietf.org
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To: Russ Housley <housley@vigilsec.com>
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Subject: Re: [Detnet] [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-detnet-mpls-oam-13
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Russ, thank you for your review and thank you all for the following discussion. I have entered a Discuss ballot for this document based on my own review.

Lars


> On Dec 11, 2023, at 23:17, Russ Housley via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> wrote:
> 
> Reviewer: Russ Housley
> Review result: Almost Ready
> 
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
> by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please wait for direction from your
> document shepherd or AD before posting a new version of the draft.
> 
> For more information, please see the FAQ at
> <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-detnet-mpls-oam-13
> Reviewer: Russ Housley
> Review Date: 2023-12-11
> IETF LC End Date: 2023-12-19
> IESG Telechat date: unknown
> 
> Summary: Almost Ready
> 
> 
> Major Concerns:
> 
> Section 3.1: In the description of the d-ACH Sequence Number, it says:
> 
>      ... The originator node
>      MUST increase the value of the Sequence Number field by 1 for each
>      active OAM packet.
> 
> Since the field is 8 bits, the description should also talk about what
> happens when 1 is added to 255.  (I assume it wraps.)
> 
> Minor Concerns:
> 
> General: Based on the Abstract, ACH seems to mean Associated Channel, but
> other places it seems to mean Associated Channel Header.  Please be
> consistent.
> 
> 
> Nits:
> 
> Section 1: s/of active and hybrid, as defined in [RFC7799], OAM methods./
>            /of active and hybrid OAM methods, as defined in [RFC7799]./
> 
> Section 2.1: Some terms have a hyphen between the term and the definition.
> Others do not.  Please use some separator in all cases.
> 
> Figure 3: s/DetNet Associated Channel Header/d-ACH/
> 
> Section 4.1: I cannot parse this sentence:
> 
>   The manipulation makes the
>   identification of the TSN Stream in the intermittent TSN nodes avoids
>   the need to look for the S-Label afterward.
> 
> Please reword.
> 
> 
> 
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