[Detnet] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-detnet-flow-information-model-10
Jouni Korhonen via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> Fri, 11 September 2020 19:40 UTC
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From: Jouni Korhonen via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org>
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Date: Fri, 11 Sep 2020 12:40:13 -0700
Archived-At: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/detnet/Xxx3o8R0IHsMp_c8qQEXrpTXdkU>
Subject: [Detnet] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-detnet-flow-information-model-10
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Reviewer: Jouni Korhonen Review result: Ready with Nits I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments. For more information, please see the FAQ at <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. Document: draft-ietf-detnet-flow-information-model-?? Reviewer: Jouni Korhonen Review Date: 2020-09-11 IETF LC End Date: 2020-09-11 IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat Summary: This informational document is ready for publication with some editorial nits. Major issues: None. Minor issues: None. Nits/editorial comments: 1) Line 210: remove the excess full stop after "Section 6" 2) Section 1.1 lines 221 to 226. I do not see a reason to the intro text here.. It will read odd after a while when things move on. I recommend leaving only the following text with some rewording: "Therefore, the DetNet flow and service information models described in this document are based on [IEEE8021Qcc], which is an amendment to [IEEE8021Q]. This document specifies flow and service information models only." 3) Line 853: YANG is referred without a reference. In general, the YANG model gets mentioned for the first time in the summary as "These models are used as input for the YANG model". That came a bit out of sudden here and a some more context would be nice to have.
- [Detnet] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-de… Jouni Korhonen via Datatracker
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