[dns-privacy] Intdir early partial review of draft-ietf-dprive-unilateral-probing-06

Haoyu Song via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org> Mon, 05 June 2023 18:41 UTC

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Date: Mon, 05 Jun 2023 11:41:51 -0700
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Subject: [dns-privacy] Intdir early partial review of draft-ietf-dprive-unilateral-probing-06
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Review is partially done. Another assignment may be needed to complete it.

Reviewer: Haoyu Song
Review result: Ready with Nits

Below are a few questions, nits, suggestions.

The description in 4.6.2 is confusing. If the first condition causes Q to be
removed, then if R is successful, Q no longer exists.  Then how can R be
further processed?  The logic here should be better organized.

4.6.3 “the timer should examine and possibly refresh its state” -> “the timer
should be examined, and its state are possibly refreshed”

When mentioning a particular state or status, it’s better to put it in
quotation marks or capitalize it to avoid confusion. For example, early, sent,
unsent, success, …

Pg.18 “For example, What if …” -> “For example, what if…”

4.6.11 “a encrypted” -> “an encrypted”