[Dots] Lars Eggert's Discuss on draft-ietf-dots-telemetry-21: (with DISCUSS and COMMENT)

[Lars Eggert via Datatracker <[e-mail]>]

Lars Eggert has entered the following ballot position for
draft-ietf-dots-telemetry-21: Discuss

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DISCUSS:
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The protocol uses traffic capacities in various ways (for pipe, baseline and
connection capacity, etc.) but doesn't indicate at what layer these capacities
are to be interpreted? L2? L3? (L1??) Would the difference in header overhead
cause issues when senders and receivers use different interpretations here?


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COMMENT:
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Thanks to Robert Sparks for their General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) review
(https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/hTMaURDAcbvHbR1TQ52GA_fJOzk).

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All comments below are about very minor potential issues that you may choose to
address in some way - or ignore - as you see fit. Some were flagged by
automated tools (via https://github.com/larseggert/ietf-reviewtool), so there
will likely be some false positives. There is no need to let me know what you
did with these suggestions.

Section 2. , paragraph 10, nit:
> igation service effectiveness. Bi-directional feedback between DOTS agents i
>                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This word is normally spelled as one.

Section 2. , paragraph 13, nit:
> ents as hints and cannot completely rely or trust the attack details conveye
>                                     ^^^^
The verb "rely" requires the preposition "on" (or "upon").

Section 3.1. , paragraph 4, nit:
> sides, can use DOTS telemetry as a feedback to automate various control and
>                                  ^^^^^^^^^^
The noun "feedback" is uncountable and doesn't require an article.

Section 3.1. , paragraph 7, nit:
> raffic from attacker traffic on a per packet basis is complex. For example, a
>                                   ^^^^^^^^^^
In this context, "per-packet" forms an adjective and is spelled with a hyphen.

Section 4.3. , paragraph 2, nit:
> son for not including these keys is because they are not included in the mes
>                                  ^^^^^^^^^^
The word "because" means "for the reason that" and thus introduces redundancy.

Section 7.1.2. , paragraph 1, nit:
>  percentile (10th percentile), mid percentile (50th percentile), high percen
>                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.

Section 7.2.1. , paragraph 12, nit:
>  appropriate unit is used. Total connections capacity: If the target is susce
>                                  ^^^^^^^^^^^
An apostrophe may be missing.

Section 8.1.5. , paragraph 17, nit:
> lue of the 'target-fqdn' parameter in an Uri-Query option. DOTS clients may a
>                                       ^^
Use "a" instead of "an" if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound,
e.g. "a sentence", "a university".

Section 9. , paragraph 7, nit:
>  default "50.00"; description "Mid percentile. If set to the same value as l
>                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.

Section 9. , paragraph 7, nit:
> ype yang:gauge64; description "Mid percentile value."; } leaf high-percentil
>                                ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.

Section 9. , paragraph 20, nit:
> ty-protocol { description "Total connections capacity per protocol. These dat
>                                  ^^^^^^^^^^^
An apostrophe may be missing.

Section 9. , paragraph 22, nit:
> Various details that describe the on-going attacks that need to be mitigated
>                                   ^^^^^^^^
Did you mean "ongoing"?

Section 11.1. , paragraph 6, nit:
>  an IP resource. An IP resource can be be a router, a host, an IoT object, a
>                                     ^^^^^
Possible typo: you repeated a word.

Section 11.1. , paragraph 46, nit:
>  DOTS telemetry for its IP addresses but a DDoS mitigator can exchange DOTS
>                                     ^^^^
Use a comma before "but" if it connects two independent clauses (unless they
are closely connected and short).