IETF Logo Mail Archive

Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-v6ops-transition-ipv4aas-12

Alissa Cooper <alissa@cooperw.in> Thu, 10 January 2019 14:41 UTC

Return-Path: <alissa@cooperw.in>
X-Original-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Delivered-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 103AB130EEF; Thu, 10 Jan 2019 06:41:22 -0800 (PST)
X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com
X-Spam-Flag: NO
X-Spam-Score: -2.7
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=-2.7 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, DKIM_SIGNED=0.1, DKIM_VALID=-0.1, DKIM_VALID_AU=-0.1, RCVD_IN_DNSWL_LOW=-0.7, SPF_PASS=-0.001, URIBL_BLOCKED=0.001] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no
Authentication-Results: ietfa.amsl.com (amavisd-new); dkim=pass (2048-bit key) header.d=cooperw.in header.b=jshV3Wuy; dkim=pass (2048-bit key) header.d=messagingengine.com header.b=KqD9uGo8
Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id QkPVL7-vkCBM; Thu, 10 Jan 2019 06:41:20 -0800 (PST)
Received: from out1-smtp.messagingengine.com (out1-smtp.messagingengine.com [66.111.4.25]) (using TLSv1.2 with cipher AECDH-AES256-SHA (256/256 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id CF54A130EFC; Thu, 10 Jan 2019 06:41:19 -0800 (PST)
Received: from compute7.internal (compute7.nyi.internal [10.202.2.47]) by mailout.nyi.internal (Postfix) with ESMTP id 2FFF223346; Thu, 10 Jan 2019 09:41:19 -0500 (EST)
Received: from mailfrontend2 ([10.202.2.163]) by compute7.internal (MEProxy); Thu, 10 Jan 2019 09:41:19 -0500
DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; d=cooperw.in; h= content-type:mime-version:subject:from:in-reply-to:date:cc :content-transfer-encoding:message-id:references:to; s=fm2; bh=T zmFuFCRk2nk3tESE1kWF2iFMxjGHgte2usBAFEjH0s=; b=jshV3WuyA7GGawSwl SDO0TO1+Tog3c9CVCaK9NUEnkybrEJgSLN7nRedkGoyzuJxAoQvKAYmD4VdITvv5 PHycmnzGHC6JqcHTnkWi4oSYV6baYnQfL7GE7dAdU1E1V17BY27ri3Va+VDngyBo ckZpJrlaHVRF0nVw2Rb9u+gpzDQ9p5Ik4aIQ6Bpze+sLEj7XPnjpaCiAJqSDdn4F ek+nFnePh4IQVTGI1sRCyGO9siPAzuQ6pWODyYkC+6URM8a4u6OnEOiTK54kadbI rleirmdOzazutHod3r1/hEz9yTKPCJV8IHrauWO7xxNCe9i74eDB+AOgcPN1nwA/ Lbvrg==
DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; d= messagingengine.com; h=cc:content-transfer-encoding:content-type :date:from:in-reply-to:message-id:mime-version:references :subject:to:x-me-proxy:x-me-proxy:x-me-sender:x-me-sender :x-sasl-enc; s=fm1; bh=TzmFuFCRk2nk3tESE1kWF2iFMxjGHgte2usBAFEjH 0s=; b=KqD9uGo8qFbCmQVkAiacA/SZHBsGJZ6XLVUDyxcKlJ76rCSqX0N8Wc0a9 Nq241b66UxROIk5BReQH8v9ntSTXi+v4pPrMzMuemBpVIYbqf8LRNDdlmRutaYzx XgOiSbtHY60LJHHN4746EqDcYGCyDiIbSc+Pm+rxk80M7KuIhI4yxrdEM69gUcJI xIjsy+jSG4a8BBQpxHyb/CPZai4tWR3PV1ihIQ9OYUtsjELT8ae29Cxsta7lympz hNeTvkwX9q2vyDjFP5x7oQ0nGYUEEFbMCfwEWhGaKsAekaUmgxQZEokQOyX1n8xD 8VFF+UjylpgHY5rMccuWqZWwAwpMA==
X-ME-Sender: <xms:jlk3XF1OXj8mdWBGe4GZy6SfbLwvPt8W-lxXSpA6Hp1wUrwqzAeEKg>
X-ME-Proxy-Cause: gggruggvucftvghtrhhoucdtuddrgedtledrfeefgdeijecutefuodetggdotefrodftvf curfhrohhfihhlvgemucfhrghsthforghilhdpqfhuthenuceurghilhhouhhtmecufedt tdenucesvcftvggtihhpihgvnhhtshculddquddttddmnecujfgurheptggguffhjgffgf fkfhfvofesthhqmhdthhdtvdenucfhrhhomheptehlihhsshgrucevohhophgvrhcuoegr lhhishhsrgestghoohhpvghrfidrihhnqeenucffohhmrghinhepihgvthhfrdhorhhgne cukfhppedujeefrdefkedruddujedrkeegnecurfgrrhgrmhepmhgrihhlfhhrohhmpegr lhhishhsrgestghoohhpvghrfidrihhnnecuvehluhhsthgvrhfuihiivgeptd
X-ME-Proxy: <xmx:jlk3XFBFR52VJCgCCmXgtB2Oljd2Bd2v4ZD30Co6Xs3LvXJA9jm2FA> <xmx:jlk3XBerl5u257U_AQlI56_c6ppn4ovb6mnCo-faS-GXGqHYvzXPKQ> <xmx:jlk3XC7E7yWONmYiFlk4MKw7q5JzcYLCARmgZrdglP_HJLvzOmQb9Q> <xmx:j1k3XMhv3LXjATDj7RQ1f_RztKO1o6pDRNwPBBcMbWTZKbTh6g3tWA>
Received: from rtp-alcoop-nitro5.cisco.com (unknown [173.38.117.84]) by mail.messagingengine.com (Postfix) with ESMTPA id 5D700102ED; Thu, 10 Jan 2019 09:41:18 -0500 (EST)
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Mime-Version: 1.0 (Mac OS X Mail 11.5 \(3445.9.1\))
From: Alissa Cooper <alissa@cooperw.in>
In-Reply-To: <154648618337.32563.8004719155986024146@ietfa.amsl.com>
Date: Thu, 10 Jan 2019 09:41:17 -0500
Cc: IETF Gen-ART <gen-art@ietf.org>, v6ops@ietf.org, draft-ietf-v6ops-transition-ipv4aas.all@ietf.org
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
Message-Id: <3BF5CD51-AAB3-40A4-95F5-5EB7ED10A041@cooperw.in>
References: <154648618337.32563.8004719155986024146@ietfa.amsl.com>
To: Matthew Miller <linuxwolf+ietf@outer-planes.net>
X-Mailer: Apple Mail (2.3445.9.1)
Archived-At: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/0qcRxrTQt_FCm3OttvSDw0cUUHI>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-v6ops-transition-ipv4aas-12
X-BeenThere: gen-art@ietf.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29
Precedence: list
List-Id: "GEN-ART: General Area Review Team" <gen-art.ietf.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/options/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/browse/gen-art/>
List-Post: <mailto:gen-art@ietf.org>
List-Help: <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Thu, 10 Jan 2019 14:41:22 -0000

Matt, thanks for your review. Jordi, thanks for your responses. I entered a DISCUSS ballot concerning the use of capitalized keywords.

Alissa

> On Jan 2, 2019, at 10:29 PM, Matthew Miller <linuxwolf+ietf@outer-planes.net> wrote:
> 
> Reviewer: Matthew Miller
> Review result: Ready with Nits
> 
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
> by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
> like any other last call comments.
> 
> For more information, please see the FAQ at
> 
> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-v6ops-transition-ipv4aas-12
> Reviewer: Matthew A. Miller
> Review Date: 2019-01-02
> IETF LC End Date: 2018-12-14
> IESG Telechat date: 2019-01-10
> 
> Summary:  This document is ready to be published as Informational,
> but has some nits that should be addressed before publication.
> 
> Major issues: N/A
> 
> Minor issue:
> 
> There are some instances within the main content that RFC 2119
> keywords are present as lower case. If these are intentional, then
> RFC 8174 needs to be applied.
> 
> Nits/editorial comments: 
> 
> * In section 1. "Introduction" (and its subsections), the term "IPv6
> Transition CE Router" is not preceded with a definite or indefinite
> article, although it is throughout the rest of this document.
> * In section 1. "Introduction", the phrase "prohibitive expense"
> ought to be "prohibitively expensive".
> * In section 7. "Code Considerations", the word "neither" might be
> better as "nor" in the phrase "in terms of RAM memory, neither
> other hardware requirements".
> * In section 7. "Code Considerations", there seems to be a misplaced
> coma; "cost of NAT44 code so, existing hardware supports them with
> minimal impact" reads better as "cost of NAT44 code, so existing
> hardware supports them with minimal impact".
> * In section 11. "Annex A: Usage Scenarios", the comma seems
> unneeded in the phrase "another CE behind it, takes care of that".
> * In section 12. "Annex B: End-User Network Architecture", the
> term "end-user" should be used consistently, it is sometimes
> "end user".
> 
> 
> _______________________________________________
> Gen-art mailing list
> Gen-art@ietf.org
> https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art

v2.23.0 | Report a Bug | By Email