Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-fecframe-ldpc-02

[Meral Shirazipour <[e-mail]>]

Hi,
   Thank you for the changes and v04. I also assume the changes v02->v03 in Section 7.1's examples were based on LC reviews.

Best Regards,
Meral

---
Meral Shirazipour
Ericsson Research
www.ericsson.com

 

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Vincent Roca [mailto:[e-mail]]
> Sent: October-09-12 09:23
> To: Meral Shirazipour; The IESG
> Cc: [e-mail]; [e-mail]
> Subject: Re: Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-fecframe-ldpc-02
> 
> Hello Meral,
> 
> Thanks a lot for your review. Please, find our answers below.
> 
> > Document: draft-ietf-fecframe-ldpc-02
> > Reviewer: Meral Shirazipour
> > Review Date: 2012-10-01
> > IETF LC End Date: 2012-10-01
> > IESG Telechat date: NA
> >
> >
> > Summary:
> > This draft is almost ready for publication as a standard track RFC, but I have
> some comments.
> >
> > Nits/editorial comments:
> > [Page 3], Section 1, "ALC [RFC5775]", please spell out ALC: "Asynchronous
> Layered Coding (ALC)"
> 
> Done.
> 
> 
> > [Page 3], Section 1, "NORM [RFC5740]", please spell out NORM: "NACK-
> Oriented Reliable Multicast (NORM)"
> 
> Done.
> 
> 
> > [Page 4], line 3, ALU is first used, please spell out: "Application Data Unit
> (ADU)", or move section "3.3 Abbreviations" to the beginning.
> 
> Done.
> 
> 
> > [Page 4], Section "3.1.  Definitions", after the ":" for all definitions, please
> start with capital letters or with lower case (for consistency please choose one)
> 
> Right, this is not consistent. Moved everything to lower case letters.
> 
> 
> > [Page 5], for "ADU Block", it would clearer to have Flow ID, Length and
> Padding fields in parenthesis next to F[], L[], and Pad[] respectively.
> 
> Done.
> I also realized we were using the term FID[i] twice to denote the F[i] field in
> section 4.3 "Source block creation".
> We corrected to use F[] throughout the document.
> 
> NEW:
>   ADU Block:  a set of ADUs that are considered together by the
>       FECFRAME instance for the purpose of the FEC scheme.  Along with
>       the flow ID (F[]), length (L[]), and padding (Pad[]) fields, they
>       form the set of source symbols over which FEC encoding will be
>       performed.
> 
> > [Page 5], after "FEC Framework Configuration Information" please add
> "(FFCI)".
> 
> Done.
> 
> 
> > [Page 5], section 4.1, "G MUST be equal..", please define G in section "3.2.
> Notations".
> 
> Added.
> 
> 
> > [Page 9], last sentence, "Each ADUI contributes to exactly one source symbol
> to the source block.", it is clearer to say "...of the source block."
> 
> Done
> 
> 
> > [Page 15], Section 6.1.1, "(e.g., before versus after FEC protection, and within
> the end-system versus in a middlebox)", please rephrase if possible, this is not
> very clear.
> 
> Done.
> 
> NEW:
> 
>    (e.g., is encryption applied before or after FEC protection, within the end-
> system or in a middlebox)
> 
> 
> > [Page 19], reference [SIMPLE_RS] is now at version 03.
> 
> Now in version -04. Updated.
> 
> 
> > [Page 19], reference [RFC5053]: title is missing "for Object Delivery"
> 
> Exact! Fixed.
> 
> 
> > -Overall for clarity, please adapt one method for spelling out acronyms
> (either in one section in intro, or throughout the text as they are first used; but
> not both).
> 
> I think it's homogeneous now.
> 
> 
> > -Overall for clarity, some line feed would be useful in section 5.
> 
> I've added the <?rfc rfcedstyle="yes"?> magic directive, and now lists are much
> more readable.
> I've also changed the style of lists for "symbols", and it also helps making it
> more readable.
> 
> >
> > Best Regards,
> > Meral
> >
> > ---
> > Meral Shirazipour
> > Ericsson Research
> > www.ericsson.com
> >
> > --
> 
> Cheers,
> 
>    Vincent, on behalf of the authors