[Gen-art] Gen-ART LC Review of draft-ietf-hip-native-api-09
Ben Campbell <ben@estacado.net> Mon, 30 November 2009 23:01 UTC
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From: Ben Campbell <ben@estacado.net>
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Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART LC Review of draft-ietf-hip-native-api-09
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I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html). Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive. Document: draft-ietf-hip-native-api-09 Reviewer: Ben Campbell Review Date: 2009-11-30 IETF LC End Date: 2009-12-03 IESG Telechat date: (if known) Summary: This draft is ready for publication as an experimental RFC. I have a small number of editorial comments that might be worth addressing if there is a new version prior to publication. Major issues: None Minor issues: None Nits/editorial comments: --Section 1, paragraph 3: Please expand ORCHID on first mention. -- Section 1, paragraph 4: Please expand LSI on first mention. -- Section 4.2, first paragraph after figure 3: Am I correct in assuming the EAI_FAMILY error only happens if the ai_family field was set to AF_HIP? That is, it would not make sense for AF_UNSPEC? The paragraph structure makes it looks like it applies to both. -- idnits returns the following, which I include without prejudice: > idnits 2.11.15 > > tmp/draft-ietf-hip-native-api-09.txt: > > Checking boilerplate required by RFC 5378 and the IETF Trust (see > http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info): > ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > == The document has an IETF Trust Provisions (12 Sep 2009) Section 6.c(i) > Publication Limitation clause. > > > Checking nits according to http://www.ietf.org/ietf/1id-guidelines.txt: > ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > No issues found here. > > Checking nits according to http://www.ietf.org/ID-Checklist.html: > ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > No issues found here. > > Miscellaneous warnings: > ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > == Line 393 has weird spacing: '... struct soc...' > > == Line 395 has weird spacing: '... struct add...' > > == The document seems to lack a disclaimer for pre-RFC5378 work, but was > first submitted before 10 November 2008. Should you add the disclaimer? > (See the Legal Provisions document at > http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info for more information.) -- however, > there's a paragraph with a matching beginning. Boilerplate error? > > > Checking references for intended status: Experimental > ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > == Outdated reference: A later version (-10) exists of > draft-ietf-shim6-multihome-shim-api-09 > > == Outdated reference: draft-ietf-shim6-proto has been published as RFC 5533 > > > Summary: 0 errors (**), 6 warnings (==), 0 comments (--). > > Run idnits with the --verbose option for more detailed information about > the items above. >
- [Gen-art] Gen-ART LC Review of draft-ietf-hip-nat… Ben Campbell