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Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-lsp-fastreroute-09.txt

"Mirja Kuehlewind (IETF)" <ietf@kuehlewind.net> Mon, 31 July 2017 13:31 UTC

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From: "Mirja Kuehlewind (IETF)" <ietf@kuehlewind.net>
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Date: Mon, 31 Jul 2017 15:31:20 +0200
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To: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>
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Subject: Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-lsp-fastreroute-09.txt
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One comment: there is an update to rfc2119 to clarify the use of not upper cases musts and should aso. published since May -> see rfc8174


> Am 31.07.2017 um 15:29 schrieb Mirja Kuehlewind (IETF) <ietf@kuehlewind.net>:
> 
> Thanks for the review!
> 
>> Am 08.07.2017 um 11:01 schrieb Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>:
>> 
>> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
>> Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
>> by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
>> like any other last call comments.
>> 
>> For more information, please see the FAQ at
>> 
>> <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
>> 
>> Document: draft-ietf-teas-gmpls-lsp-fastreroute-09.txt
>> Reviewer: Francis Dupont
>> Review Date: 20170706
>> IETF LC End Date: 20170707
>> IESG Telechat date: unknown
>> 
>> Summary: Ready
>> 
>> Major issues: None
>> 
>> Minor issues: None
>> 
>> Nits/editorial comments: 
>> - ToC page 3 and Acknowledgments page 21:
>>  Acknowledgements -> AcknowledgDements
>> 
>> - 1 page 4: you should introduce the LSP abbrev too (BTW if GMPLS
>> is a well known abbrev cf
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/materials/abbrev.expansion.txt
>> LSP is not, IMHO because this abbrev has some other meanings in
>> the IETF scope)
>> 
>> - 4.5.1 page 9: The Node-ID address must match the source -> MUST
>> or has to
>> 
>> - 4.5.1 page 9: may -> can (RFC 2119 did not clearly specify that
>> keywords are only in uppercase. Note only the previous item is
>> really ambiguous).
>> 
>> - 5.1 page 11 and 5.2.2 page 14: e.g. -> e.g.,
>> 
>> - 5.3 page 15 and 6 page 16: may -> can
>> 
>> - 11.1 page 20 RFC3473: should be ReserVation -> ReSerVation
>> but the bug is in the RFC 3473 title please don't fix...
>> 
>> - Contributors page 21:
>> * Orange CH is ambiguous: there are some cities named Orange,
>>  for instance a medium one in France. I suggest to put the CH
>>  on the next line
>> * China -> PR China or CN (i.e., follow UPU or IETF specs)
>> 
>> Thanks
>> 
>> Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr
>> 
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