Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Early review of draft-brownlee-svg-rfc-07
Nevil Brownlee <n.brownlee@auckland.ac.nz> Mon, 29 September 2014 06:06 UTC
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Date: Mon, 29 Sep 2014 19:06:31 +1300
From: Nevil Brownlee <n.brownlee@auckland.ac.nz>
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To: Suresh Krishnan <suresh.krishnan@ericsson.com>, "draft-brownlee-svg-rfc.all@tools.ietf.org" <draft-brownlee-svg-rfc.all@tools.ietf.org>, General Area Review Team <gen-art@ietf.org>
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Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Early review of draft-brownlee-svg-rfc-07
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Hi Suresh: Thanks very much for your review. Responses inline ... On 21/08/14 5:27 PM, Suresh Krishnan wrote: > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for draft-brownlee-svg-rfc-07 > > For background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at > <http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html>. > > > > Please resolve these comments along with any other comments you may receive. > > > > Summary: This draft is on track to be published as an Informational RFC, > but I have some suggestions that the authors may like to consider. > > > * Meta comment > > > It is not clear how the SVGs will be included in the RFCs? Will they be > included as inline XML? Can you please clarify. Getting an SVG diagram into an RFC is a matter for verson 3 of xml2rfc (see Paul Hoffman's "The 'XML2RFC' version 3 Vocabulary," draft-hoffman-xml2rfc) - I've added a note at the end of section 3 to say To include a diagram into an RFC, the xml2rfc (v3) tool will need to provide a way to include SVG drawings in Internet Drafts. > * Section 1 > > > Last paragraph: It is not really true that diagrams in RFCs are not > normative. e.g. The ordering of fields in a packet is specified by a > packet format diagram and the text only describes the contents of the > fields (and not necessarily the structure of the packet itself). Is this > paragraph necessary? Hmm. I thought it was, but looking back at 'classic' RFCs like 1035 I see that you're right. 793 says that its TCP state diagram is "only a summary and must not be taken as the total specification." How about changing it as follows: OLD: they are informative, not normative. NEW: they provide supporting detail, and should not be considered to be complete specifications in themselves. > * Section 4 > > > Shouldn't we also be discussing the "role" attribute in the > accessibility context? Well caught. I've added the 'role' SVG attribute, for all the elements where it's allowed in SVG 1.2 Tiny. > I also found that the Web Accessibility Initiative's ARIA primer to be a > good introduction in addition to the SVG-ARIA reference. > http://www.w3.org/TR/wai-aria-primer/ Added that into the last paragraph of Section 4, Accessibility. > * Sections 5.2 and 5.3 > > > The meta language used in these sections (especially 5.3) is a bit > confusing. Is the goal of such languages to also go into the > presentation details as they do now? I think it would be more > illustrative if the example languages are made a bit simpler. e.g. I use > the mscgen program a lot in my day job and the language used by mscgen > is a bit simpler and illustrates the message sequence more clearly. > > http://www.mcternan.me.uk/mscgen/ When I started my draft, I wasn't aware of all the diagram-drawing packages that are out there! My examples in the draft are intended to show what I think would be 'good' diagrams. For now I'll start collecting a list of diagram-drawing websites and applications; one day perhaps that list can move into the draft. > Thanks > > Suresh > -- --------------------------------------------------------------------- Nevil Brownlee Computer Science Department Phone: +64 9 373 7599 x88941 The University of Auckland FAX: +64 9 373 7453 Private Bag 92019, Auckland 1142, New Zealand
- [Gen-art] Gen-ART Early review of draft-brownlee-… Suresh Krishnan
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Early review of draft-brown… Nevil Brownlee