[Iotops] Re: WG Last Call: draft-ietf-iotops-7228bis-03 (Ends 2026-01-08)

[Marco Tiloca <[e-mail]>]

Hi all,

I have recently re-read this document and I think that it is basically ready.

Please find some comments below.

Best,
/Marco



[Section 1]

* "Today, diverse sizes of constrained devices with different resources and capabilities are becoming connected."

  I guess that the intended subject of "are becoming connected" is "devices", but the current phrasing gives the impression that it is "sizes" instead.

  Also, I guess that "sizes" refers to the clusters/aggregations of such devices.

  So perhaps the following alternative phrasing?

  > Today, constrained devices with different resources and capabilities are becoming connected as arranged in aggregations of diverse sizes.

* "The present document is a revision of [RFC7228]."

  It is usually expected that a summary of the revised points is provided in the introduction of a document that obsoletes/updates another one.

  I can see that the summary is given later in Appendix A.

  At least, the quoted sentence of Section 1 can be extended with a pointer to Appendix A, although it might be preferable for some readers to have that summary handy in Section 1 already, rather than much later in an appendix.


[Section 2]

* "... to make this scaling up ..."

  Which one? The current bullet point talks about a "scaling down". Does "scaling up" here refer to the one mentioned in the previous bullet point?


[Section 2.1]

* s/may be lacking/may be missing

* "security characteristics attainable"

  Perhaps the following phrasing, instead?

  > security properties and guarantees attainable


[Section 5.1]

* "(note: 'Sx' stands for 'Size x')"

  Like in Section 5.3 right below Table 12, the quoted text should actually be in a new line, i.e., detached from what is supposed to be a footnote for the rightmost column of Table 10.


[Section 5.2]

* Considering the term used in the section, the section title can be changed to be "Classes of Internet Technology Level".


[Section 5.3]

* Note that there still is a placeholder TODO note at the beginning of the section.


[Nits]

* Section 2.3
--- s/always is a/is always a

* Section 2.3.1
--- s/typically are composed/are typically composed

* Section 3
--- s/an Memory/a Memory
--- s/controllers, these are/controllers, which is
________________________________
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Subject: [Iotops] WG Last Call: draft-ietf-iotops-7228bis-03 (Ends 2026-01-08)


Subject: WG Last Call: draft-ietf-iotops-7228bis-03 (Ends 2026-01-08)

This message starts a 4-week WG Last Call for this document.

Abstract:
   The Internet Protocol Suite is increasingly used on small devices
   with severe constraints on power, memory, and processing resources,
   creating constrained-node networks.  This document provides a number
   of basic terms that have been useful in research and standardization
   work for constrained-node networks.

   This document obsoletes RFC 7228.

File can be retrieved from:
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