Re: [OPSAWG] WG LC: L3NM [and vpn-common documents]

mohamed.boucadair@orange.com Mon, 29 March 2021 06:27 UTC

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From: mohamed.boucadair@orange.com
To: "adrian@olddog.co.uk" <adrian@olddog.co.uk>, "opsawg@ietf.org" <opsawg@ietf.org>
CC: "'Joe Clarke (jclarke)'" <jclarke=40cisco.com@dmarc.ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: [OPSAWG] WG LC: L3NM [and vpn-common documents]
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Date: Mon, 29 Mar 2021 06:27:23 +0000
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Subject: Re: [OPSAWG] WG LC: L3NM [and vpn-common documents]
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Hi Adrian, 

Thank you for the careful review. 

Almost all your comments are addressed in https://tinyurl.com/l3nm-latest. 

I agree to replace the reference to ns-definition I-D with a pointer to ns-framework, but I don't know what happens with the xml2rfc when I make the change. Will fix that one both in the L3NM and the common I-D.  

I created an issue for the slaac comment (https://github.com/IETF-OPSAWG-WG/lxnm/issues/261). Will address that one in the same time that we are dealing with how to craft an IPv6-only L3NM config (a first proposal from Paul with some feedback can be seen at https://github.com/IETF-OPSAWG-WG/lxnm/issues/225).

Cheers,
Med

> -----Message d'origine-----
> De : OPSAWG [mailto:opsawg-bounces@ietf.org] De la part de Adrian
> Farrel
> Envoyé : samedi 27 mars 2021 16:35
> À : opsawg@ietf.org
> Cc : 'Joe Clarke (jclarke)' <jclarke=40cisco.com@dmarc.ietf.org>
> Objet : Re: [OPSAWG] WG LC: L3NM [and vpn-common documents]
> 
> Hi,
> 
> WGLC review of draft-ietf-opsawg-l3sm-l3nm-07
> 
> I've reviewed this document a couple of times as it was being made,
> and I have attended a few of the design team calls mainly as a
> spectator. I co-chaired the L3SM working group so I have some clue as
> to what is going on. I'm working with some of the authors on the EU-
> funded Teraflow project where we are putting together a top-to-bottom
> YANG-based management system and where the L3NM function is clearly
> needed.
> 
> As part of working group last call I've had another look at the draft
> and I conclude it is ready for publication.
> 
> It may be worth explicitly notifying the BESS working group during
> IETF last call to ensure adequate review from L3VPN experts.
> 
> There are some minor points below.
> 
> Best,
> Adrian
> 
> ===
> 
> 1.
> 
> s/used to fed/used to feed/
> 
> ---
> 
> 4.
> 
> I think that [I-D.ietf-teas-ietf-network-slice-framework] is a better
> reference than [I-D.ietf-teas-ietf-network-slice-definition].  The
> latter is due to be merged into the former, so in time only the
> former will contain useful material.
> 
> ---
> 
> 5.
> 
> s/Such view is only/Such a view is only/ s/a L3SM template/an L3SM
> template/ s/A L3VPN involves/An L3VPN involves/ s/represented as
> using/represented using/
> 
> ---
> 
> 6.1
> 
> OLD
>    Also common addition and/or removal of sites of an existing
> customer
>    VPN can benefit of using L3NM by creation of workflows that either
>    prune or add nodes as required from the network data mode.
> NEW
>    A common additional function for VPNs is the addition or removal
> of
>    customer sites.  Workflows can use the L3NM in these scenarios to
>    add or prune nodes from the network data model as required.
> END
> 
> ---
> 
> 6.2
> 
> s/manage to avoid asymmetric/managed to avoid asymmetric/ s/usage of
> unavailable/use of unavailable/
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.2
> 
> s/scheme(s)/schemes/
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.5
> 
> s/enable a VPN network access/enables VPN network access/ s/values
> are defines defined in/values are defined in/
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.5
> 
> OLD
>    'router-id':  Indicates a unique Router ID information.  It can be
> an
>       IPv4 or IPv6 address as a function of the enclosed address-
> family.
> NEW
>    'router-id':  Indicates a unique Router ID.  It can be either an
> IPv4
>       IPv6 address as a function of the setting of 'address-family'.
> END
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.5
> 
>    'maximum-routes':  Indicates the maximum prefixes that the VPN
> node
>       can accept for a given address family and routing protocol.  If
>       'protocol' is set to 'any', this means that the maximum value
>       applies to any active routing protocol.
> 
> To check that you mean "any". That is, the maximum applied to each
> protocol individually. You would be better to use "each".
> Or you may mean "all". I.e., the maximum applies to the sum of all
> protocols. You would be better to use "applies as a total across all"
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.6.1
> 
> s/a L3VPN/an L3VPN/
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.6.2
> 
> s/or both information/or both/
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.6.2
> 
>    Figure 11 shows the structure of the dynamic IPv4 address
> assignment.
> and
>    Figure 12 shows the structure of the dynamic IPv6 address
> assignment.
> 
> Is the word "dynamic" wrong here as the options include "static"?
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.6.2
> 
> I expected Figure 12 to show provider-dhcp-slaac and slaac
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.6.3
> 
> s/route(s)/routes/
> s/base that make use of/base that makes use of/ s/IP address(es)/IP
> addresses/ s/route(s)/routes/
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.6.3
> 
> OLD
>          'warning-threshold':a warning
>          notification will be triggered'
>       A warning notification is triggered when this limit is reached.
> NEW
>          'warning-threshold': A warning notification is triggered
> when
>             this limit is reached.
> END
> 
> ---
> 
> 7.7
> 
> s/will have an effect to disable/will have the effect of disabling/
> s/Global data nodes/global data nodes/   ??
> s/Except the 'status' node/Except for the 'status' node/
> 
> ---
> 
> 8.
> 
> leaf default-route
>    s/route(s)/routes/  (twice)
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: OPSAWG <opsawg-bounces@ietf.org> On Behalf Of Joe Clarke
> (jclarke)
> Sent: 22 March 2021 13:32
> To: opsawg@ietf.org
> Subject: [OPSAWG] WG LC: L3NM and vpn-common documents
> 
> Hello, WG.  One of the action items out of the 110 meeting was to put
> the L3NM (https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-opsawg-l3sm-l3nm-07)
> and vpn-common
> (https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-opsawg-vpn-common-03)
> documents through WG LC.  The authors have said that these can work
> independently from the L2NM document, which is still being revised.
> 
> This begins a two-week WG LC for these two documents.  Please provide
> your comments and concerns by April 5, 2021.  Additionally, if anyone
> is interested in acting as shepherd for either of these documents,
> please let the chairs know.
> 
> Thanks.
> 
> Joe
> 
> _______________________________________________
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> 
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