Re: [OPSAWG] AD review of draft-ietf-opsawg-tlstm-update-10

["Rob Wilton (rwilton)" <[e-mail]>]

Hi Kenneth,

Apologies for the delay in progressing this. -11 is fine.

Just closing off a couple of questions inline below.


From: Kenneth Vaughn <[e-mail]>
Sent: 23 December 2022 15:13
To: Rob Wilton (rwilton) <[e-mail]>
Cc: [e-mail]; [e-mail]
Subject: Re: AD review of draft-ietf-opsawg-tlstm-update-10

Rob,

Thank you for your detailed comments. Please see my detailed responses inline below.

In general, I accepted the comments and reflected the changes in -11; the only two exceptions are that I did not add any requirements regarding the usage of hash algorithms based on prior WG discussions and I am unclear what issue you had with the editor's address field.

Regards,
Ken Vaughn

Trevilon LLC
1060 S Hwy 107
Del Rio, TN 37727
[phone] cell
[e-mail]<mailto:[e-mail]>
www.trevilon.com<http://www.trevilon.com>


On Dec 19, 2022, at 11:09 AM, Rob Wilton (rwilton) <[e-mail]<mailto:[e-mail]>> wrote:

(1) p 4, sec 2.3.  TLS Version

TLSTMv1.3 MUST only be used with
  (D)TLS version 1.2 and later.

It wasn't clear to me exactly what is meant by TLSTMv1.3, and this is the only use of this term.  Could you be more specific here please?
I removed the "v1.3", which was erroneous text from a previous draft.


(2) p 6, sec 4.  MIB Module Definition

          Redistribution and use in source and binary forms, with or
          without modification, is permitted pursuant to, and subject
          to the license terms contained in, the Revised BSD License
          set forth in Section 4.c of the IETF Trust's Legal Provisions
          Relating to IETF Documents
          (http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info)."

Please add the RFC 2119 boilerplate text to this MIB.  E.g.,

    The key words 'MUST', 'MUST NOT', 'REQUIRED', 'SHALL', 'SHALL
    NOT', 'SHOULD', 'SHOULD NOT', 'RECOMMENDED', 'NOT RECOMMENDED',
    'MAY', and 'OPTIONAL' in this document are to be interpreted as
    described in BCP 14 (RFC 2119) (RFC 8174) when, and only when,
    they appear in all capitals, as shown here.
Done


(3) p 9, sec 4.  MIB Module Definition

         An SnmpTLSFingerprint value is composed of a 1-octet hashing
         algorithm ...

This description somewhat mixes the definition of what the field is, along with some historical context.  Hence, I suggest that it might be helpful to split the description between what the field is now vs how is was derived.
Change made


It also wasn't clear to me whether there is a restriction that only versions of (D)TLS greater than 1.3 may use an algorithm value greater than 8, and whether that restriction must be stated here.
The WG expressed that the hash algorithm used by the fingerprint did not have to track the (D)TLS usage and the selection is manufacturer specific. Thus, it would seem as if we should remain silent on this issue.

[Rob Wilton (rwilton)]
Okay, makes sense.



Nit level comments:

(4) p 8, sec 4.  MIB Module Definition

Typo, potenitally -> potentially
Corrected


(5) p 15, sec 4.  MIB Module Definition

          certificate, then additional rows MUST be searched looking

Extra line break in the description above?
Corrected


(6) p 27, sec 5.  Security Considerations

  SNMP versions prior to SNMPv3 did not include adequate security.
  Even if the network itself is secure (for example, by using IPsec),
  even then, there is no control as to who on the secure network is
  allowed to access and GET/SET (read/change/create/delete) the objects
  in this MIB module.

Suggest eliding the "even then" since the sentence starts with "Even ..."
Corrected by deleting the "even then"


(7) p 31, sec 8.2.  Informative References

  Kenneth Vaughn (editor)
  Trevilon LLC
  1060 Highway 107 South
  Del Rio, TN 37727
  United States of America
  Phone: [phone]
  Email: [e-mail]<mailto:[e-mail]>
Unclear what the comment is

[Rob Wilton (rwilton)]
Sorry, an unfortunately artifact from my comment script, you can ignore it.

Regards,
Rob



Grammar nits from an automated tool:
Grammar Warnings:
Section: 3.2, draft text:
This document does not specify an application profile, hence all of the compliance requirements in [RFC8446] apply.
Warning:  Consider using all the.
Suggested change:  "all the"
Corrected



Section: 6, draft text:
IANA is asked to create a new registry called the SNMP-TLSTM HashAlgorithm Registry in the Structure of Management Information (SMI) Numbers (MIB Module Registrations) Group and to update the proposed URL reference in the above MIB ( listed as "https://www.iana.org/assignments/smi-numbers/smi-numbers.xhtml" under SnmpTLSFingerprint), if needed, to accurately reflect its location.
Warning:  Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis.
Suggested change:  "("
Corrected



Regards,
Rob