[RTG-DIR] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te-bandwidth-availability-11.txt
"Bocci, Matthew (Nokia - GB)" <matthew.bocci@nokia.com> Mon, 10 December 2018 10:35 UTC
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From: "Bocci, Matthew (Nokia - GB)" <matthew.bocci@nokia.com>
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CC: "draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te-bandwidth-availability@ietf.org" <draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te-bandwidth-availability@ietf.org>, "rtg-dir@ietf.org" <rtg-dir@ietf.org>, "ccamp@ietf.org" <ccamp@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: RtgDir review: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te-bandwidth-availability-11.txt
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Date: Mon, 10 Dec 2018 10:35:19 +0000
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Subject: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te-bandwidth-availability-11.txt
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Hello, I have been selected as the Routing Directorate reviewer for this draft. The Routing Directorate seeks to review all routing or routing-related drafts as they pass through IETF last call and IESG review, and sometimes on special request. The purpose of the review is to provide assistance to the Routing ADs. For more information about the Routing Directorate, please see http://trac.tools.ietf.org/area/rtg/trac/wiki/RtgDir Although these comments are primarily for the use of the Routing ADs, it would be helpful if you could consider them along with any other IETF Last Call comments that you receive, and strive to resolve them through discussion or by updating the draft. Document: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te-bandwidth-availability-11.txt Reviewer: Matthew Bocci Review Date: 9 December 2018 IETF LC End Date: Unknown Intended Status: Standards Track Summary: I have some minor concerns about this document that I think should be resolved before publication. Comments: The document is relatively concise, but I found that it could do with rewording in many areas for clarity and to correct the English grammar. I have one issue that I found that I consider major that I have listed below but that should be resolved as soon as possible. There are also some minor issues related to the clarity of the specification that should be fixed before publication. Major Issues: Page 6, 3rd Paragraph: "When two LSPs request bandwidth with the same availability requirement, contention SHOULD/MUST be resolved by comparing the node IDs, .." Either it is a SHOULD or a MUST. The distinction between the two can make the difference between a document being acceptable or not to a WG and the IETF and can raise wider arguments about interoperability. Please resolve which of these you mean before proceeding. Minor Issues: Page 5, 1st Paragraph below figure 1: "The Availability TLV MUST come along with Ethernet Bandwidth Profile TLV." I think you need to be more careful in the way this phrased. You are not saying that an Ethernet BW Profile TLV must always be accompanied by an Availability TLV, but rather that if you include an Availability TLV, the Ethernet BW Profile TLV must also be included. I suggest rephrasing this to "When the Availability TLV is included it MUST be present along with the Ethernet Bandwidth Profile TLV." Page 3, 2nd Paragraph: I found the whole discussion here somewhat confusing. The text seems to mix up service availability requirements (which are often specified in an SLA e.g. % of time a service is UP), with the ability of a given service (voice/video/non-real-time data etc) to withstand fluctuations in the bandwidth of the underlying transport. This could be fixed by always using the term 'bandwidth availability' instead of just 'availability'. Nits: I found that the readability could be improved with some rewording of the text to improve the English grammar and sentence structure. I would suggest reviewing with a native English speaker to help with this. Thanks, Matthew
- [RTG-DIR] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsvp-te… Bocci, Matthew (Nokia - GB)
- Re: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsv… Yemin (Amy)
- Re: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir review: draft-ietf-ccamp-rsv… Yemin (Amy)