Re: [sacm] Review comments on SACM Architecture

[Bill Munyan <[e-mail]>]

Ira,
Thanks very much for your comments and review!  I have made a number of the
changes you've suggested.  I've changed some of the formatting in section 5
(Taxonomy) and have filled in a few of them also, which covers many of your
comments there.  There's still a number of TBDs in there, just as a
placeholder for Adam and myself.

I'm shooting to get the next working version published next week, so
hopefully there will be more to review.

Thanks again!
-Bill M.


On Sun, Aug 30, 2020 at 5:17 PM Ira McDonald <[e-mail]>
wrote:

> Hi,
>
> Version:  draft-ietf-sacm-arch-06 (11 May 2020)
>
> Summary:  Quite good document - NOT ready for WG or IETF Last Call
>
> Comments (mostly editorial, some technical):
>
> * Global
> - [title case all role names (e.g., 'consumer -> Consumer) for readability]
> - [references to "ietf-sacm-terminology" should all be deleted - it expired
>   in June 2019]
>
> 3.  Architectural Overview
>
> - last paragraph
> - provider -> Provider
> - Consumers can -> A Consumer can
>
> 3.2.1 Orchestrators
> - Orchestration components exists -> Orchestrator components exist
>
> 3.2.2.  Repositories/CMDBs
> - forward reference to unexplained acronym
> - CMDBs -> Configuration Management Databases (CMDBs)
>
> 3.2.3.  Integration Service
> - If...capabilities, the -> If...capabilities, then the
> - services are woven - SACM components are woven
> - "request/response"-style -> request/response-style
> - allow components the ability to -> allow components to
>
> 4.1.  Interaction Categories
> - Service; broadcast-> Service: broadcast
>
> 4.1.1.  Broadcast
> - "publish/subscribe" -> publish/subscribe
>
> 4.2.1.  Orchestrator Onboarding
> - onboards to the ecosystem -> onboards to the SACM ecosystem
> - "service handlers" per the Section 5.2 - [but "service handlers" are not
> defined in 5.2]
> - The following requirements exist... -> [turn rest of paragraph into a
> bullet list]
> - Administrative interface functions are described... - [widowed sentence
> at end of bullet list]
>
> 4.2.2.  Component Onboarding
> - part of the ecosystem -> part of the SACM ecosystem
> - The component onboarding... -> [turn rest of paragraph into a bullet
> list]
> - understood by the Orchestrator (TBD -> [fix the TBD]
>
> 4.3.1.  Initiate Ad-Hoc Collection
> - The PCS then forms -> Each PCS then forms
>
> 4.3.2.2.  Cancel Periodic Collection
> - The receiving PCS -> Each of the receiving PCS
>
> 4.3.3.  Coordinate Observational/Event-based Collection
> - the "observer" acts as the Posture Collection Service -> [backwards] the
> Posture Collection Service acts as the "observer"
>
> 4.3.3.2.  Cancel Observational/Event-based Collection
> - on that PCS -> on those PCS components
>
> 4.3.4 through 4.3.8
> - [fix the TBDs]
>
> 5.1.  Orchestrator Registration
> - onboards to the ecosystem -> onboards to the SACM ecosystem
>
> 5.1.6.  Process Description
> - service handlers -> [still an undefined term - never appears in 5.2]
>
> 5.2.  Component Registration
> - part of the ecosystem -> part of the SACM ecosystem
>
> 5.2.4.  Request Payload
> - [fix TBD]
>
> - identifying-information - component-type -> identifying-information:
> component-type [use semicolon delimiters, not dashes]
>
> 5.3.1.7.  Response Payload
> - [fix TBD]
>
> - 5.3.2, 5.3.3, 5.3.4
> - [empty sections - add text]
>
> 6, 7, 8
> - [fix TBD]
>
> 9.1.  Normative References
> - [update all references]
>
> 9.2.  Informative References
> - [I-D.ietf-sacm-terminology] -> [delete reference and embed terms in
> Architecture]
>
> Appendices
> - [not reviewed - ran out of time and patience]
>
> Cheers,
> - Ira
>
>
>
>
> *Ira McDonald (Musician / Software Architect)Co-Chair - TCG Trusted
> Mobility Solutions WG*
>
> *Co-Chair - TCG Metadata Access Protocol SG*
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> *Chair - Linux Foundation Open Printing WGSecretary - IEEE-ISTO Printer
> Working GroupCo-Chair - IEEE-ISTO PWG Internet Printing Protocol WGIETF
> Designated Expert - IPP & Printer MIBBlue Roof Music / High North
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