[Gen-art] review of draft-dawkins-iesg-nomcom-advisor-iaoc-03.txt

Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr> Mon, 09 October 2017 13:16 UTC

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From: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>
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Cc: draft-dawkins-iesg-nomcom-advisor-iaoc.all@ietf.org
Date: Mon, 09 Oct 2017 14:56:41 +0200
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Subject: [Gen-art] review of draft-dawkins-iesg-nomcom-advisor-iaoc-03.txt
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I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-dawkins-iesg-nomcom-advisor-iaoc-03.txt
Reviewer: Francis Dupont
Review Date: 20170929
IETF LC End Date: 20171016
IESG Telechat date: unknown

Summary: Ready

Major issues: None

Minor issues: None

Nits/editorial comments: 
 - ToC page 2 and 7 page 4: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments

 - about A.1 page 5: I agree it can be critical to have flexibility
  in the text establishing rules. As you know the French law is
  fully written down so this principle verifies each time a new
  question happens. For instance the first time a judge had to decide
  about software ownership he asked how a program was presented and
  simply applied the law about texts even a program is not a novel
  because the law about texts is about texts in general. Of course
  this was changed by dedicated laws a few years after (unfortunately
  because the author of a text has a lot of rights, i.e. it was pretty
  good for programmers).

 - A.2 page 6: in [RFC7437],Section 4.6
                            ^ add a space after the comma

 - A.3 page 7: sufficent -> sufficient and qualiified -> qualified

Regards

Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr